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JMB7478

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JMB7478

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 265
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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JMB7478's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

#20630276
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47907) - you deserved it (12102)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:51pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

#20628087
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53441) - you deserved it (6572)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

#20627981
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33704) - you deserved it (69541)

On 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia

Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML

#20625733
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38665) - you deserved it (23620)

On 04/27/2013 at 6:05pm - work - by naps aren't what they used to be (man) - United States

Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML

#20625307
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54149) - you deserved it (3581)

On 04/27/2013 at 2:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis)

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a segway. He still got away. FML

#20606053
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40483) - you deserved it (8768)

On 04/19/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand

Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML

#20605834
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47876) - you deserved it (5535)

On 04/19/2013 at 7:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

#20605608
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54893) - you deserved it (6860)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm - kids - by reyoflight (man) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

#19449601
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30892) - you deserved it (5112)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

#19449472
467 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14672) - you deserved it (37659)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by erockinthesuburb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got whiplash from sneezing. FML

#19448000
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18924) - you deserved it (2795)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:04am - health - by kissrocks4 - United States (California)

Today, it's my 30th birthday. I was having a great night until I overheard my mother say, "I can't believe that thing made it to 30." FML

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a basketball game. A very pretty woman sat next to him. During the third quarter, the kiss cam came on. But it didn't show him and me, it showed him and the other girl. And they kissed. FML

#19426684
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45761) - you deserved it (3201)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:19pm - love - by jordyn173 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was taking a really big test in a class that I was failing. It was worth at least 7 grades so I studied my butt off. During the test, a girl with huge breasts sat down next to me and I couldn't stop staring. My test got confiscated because they thought I was cheating. FML

#19414845
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9521) - you deserved it (50609)

On 04/05/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by tatatest (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, during sex, my boyfriend stops and asks if he can eat a sandwich while we do it. FML

#19414574
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26803) - you deserved it (4302)

On 04/05/2012 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Krissy (woman) - United States



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