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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7118
  • Number of comments : 1516
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 41 posted

About Iwtumn : I read, I knit, I bake and I drink a lot of tea. Yeah, I'm basically a grandma in the body of someone in their twenties.

Iwtumn's page activity

Visits<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 11:41am<b>thinlinetele</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:10pm<b>ADC_Lover_2011</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 5:22pm<b>thunderniron</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 9:48am<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 12:57pm<b>Ben_Dover831</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 3:24am<b>Rylai</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 6:24am<b>RedRiolu</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 7:40pm<b>slappygecko</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 4:22pm<b>Becca34</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 3:04pm<b>seenoevil818</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 2:13am<b>frankmz</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 12:06am<b>krakalacka</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 11:17am<b>Ladisa</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 3:27am<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 2:43am<b>toastbrot</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 2:35am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 2:02pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 10:50am

Fucked!<b>frankmz</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 6:06am<b>Ladisa</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 9:27am<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 8:44am<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 4:50pm<b>LadyIrene</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 7:58pm<b>Jrsmommy2014</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 2:41am<b>grifmelo</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 4:45am<b>eski2015</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 11:41pm<b>rhiley</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 5:44am<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 6:58pm<b>Avi8r</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 12:06am<b>NNOTCHO</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 1:04am<b>theRonin</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 3:35am<b>Stachelschaf</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 11:00pm<b>WiredTechnician</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 3:56am<b>FailStaff</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 7:00am<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 7:00am<b>Dune1988</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 8:33pm

Iwtumn's FML badges

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of Iwtumn's badges

Iwtumn's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my credit card got blocked. Apparently, my bank thinks buying a $130 flat iron online is suspicious. FML

by jpmetz / 09/26/2011 at 12:29am / United States (Michigan) / Money

Today, while letting horses out to switch pasture, one ran at me, sending me through the electric fence and into a mud puddle. Wrapped in electric fence, I sat in that electric mud puddle, screaming every time it shocked me. Help arrived, once they'd had a good long laugh. FML

by electricpuddle / 04/24/2011 at 9:11pm / Animals

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

by sandra22 / 01/22/2011 at 3:49am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 1:24am / France / Intimacy

Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 6:50am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML

by Jen / 12/01/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML

by sickkid / 11/23/2009 at 1:05pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, in the middle of an exam, I was escorted out by the campus police due to suspicion of a concealed weapon. The officers couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes when they found out the weapon was metal knitting needles. FML

by dangerousknitter / 10/07/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up from a nap on my new bed to see my phone lit up with new texts. My friend sent out "Wanna test out my new bed?" as a mass text while I was asleep to every boy in my phone. Mark will be here in an hour, Jon wants to know what I'm wearing, and my ex's new girlfriend is not amused. FML

by Anathema_360 / 09/20/2009 at 7:19pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

by Jeweler / 06/26/2009 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called the number a guy had given me at a bar last night. I got the Soulja Boy Hotline. Now every few hours I get messages on my phone like 'Good morning! Jump on up and get yo swag on, this is Soulja Boy!' and I can't seem to get it to stop. FML

by rain / 05/31/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

by deucelututi / 05/31/2009 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous