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Iwtumn

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Iwtumn

207Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6418
  • Number of comments : 1483
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 40 posted

About Iwtumn : I read, I knit, I bake and I drink a lot of tea. Yeah, I'm basically a grandma in the body of someone in their twenties.

Iwtumn's page activity

Visits<b>ab_6738</b> - 24 hours ago<b>nelliegw</b> - yesterday at 9:54am<b>the_real_dvd</b> - yesterday at 11:53pm<b>PHP</b> - yesterday at 5:06pm<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 12:35am<b>FailStaff</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:52pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 5:40am<b>IAm123</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 3:55pm<b>Dune1988</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 2:32pm<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 6:17pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 2:05pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:07pm<b>laughingboy23</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 7:57am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 7:07pm<b>osabear242</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 5:59pm<b>ladycube</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 2:07pm<b>banished0blivion</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:53pm<b>lmbachman</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:18pm

Fucked!<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 7:00am<b>Dune1988</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 8:33pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:07am<b>lmbachman</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 8:17am<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:35am<b>Quiggles789</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 7:24pm<b>cOOkiEzRgOOd</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 4:00pm<b>onlychildFTW</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 10:30am<b>PotterHead_DH</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 7:57am<b>ladycube</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 2:48am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:22am<b>fastman19</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 5:12am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 2:10am<b>EnigmaticSoul</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 4:45pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:32am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 10:48pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 11:38am<b>pete9913</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 1:32pm

Iwtumn's FML badges

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of Iwtumn's badges

Iwtumn's favorite FMLs

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56625) - you deserved it (9633)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49051) - you deserved it (9503)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59359) - you deserved it (68183)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I saw mice eating from my cat's food dish, again. Where is my cat? He's busy bringing in more mice, birds, and once even an unharmed chipmunk through his cat door. FML

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65152) - you deserved it (21348)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

#20574865
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37550) - you deserved it (6449)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm - misc - by me (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36740) - you deserved it (4809)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23155) - you deserved it (64224)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they are made of a fish bi-product. Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there are countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard. FML

#20502144
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35256) - you deserved it (4266)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:48am - animals - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend found out you can use food coloring in anything. Everything she cooks is now in bright neon colors. I feel like I'm in a Dr Seuss book. FML

#20475517
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35932) - you deserved it (5945)

On 01/23/2013 at 8:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45220) - you deserved it (7625)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)



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