ItsAlice

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Offline (the 08/26/2015 at 5:25pm)

ItsAlice

0Fucked!

ItsAlice
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 470
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About ItsAlice : About meekskalsksl like anyone would read this:

I love sunshine and being outside when it's warm. I love to take photos I do have an Instagram. I hibernate in the winter time and autumn.

I love food. I'm addicted to chocolate.

I stay away from pointless drama and will only fight back if it involves me. I hang out with friends as much as possible. I'm never home. I love going to concerts to hear my favorite artists.

Always on the mobile version! I've been reading FML's for like 4 years. I like to talk to lots of different kinds of people…as long as they aren't creeps!

ItsAlice's page activity

Visits<b>ilcap</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:15pm<b>BigJoeZD</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:30pm<b>Hello9875</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 3:23pm

ItsAlice's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of ItsAlice's badges

ItsAlice's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents made a game out of deliberately walking in when I'm trying to masturbate. They even turn on all the hot water taps when I'm trying to do it in the shower. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2014 at 10:55pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

by gottacatchemall / 01/08/2014 at 12:43am / United States / Intimacy

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, as a pickup line, a guy said to me, "Yo, can I kiss your vag' under the mistletoe?" FML

by mistletoe / 12/08/2013 at 9:21pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my kitten decided that having diarrhea was not a good enough reason to stop running in circles around my living room. FML

by MegahnDN / 06/11/2010 at 10:33am / United States / Health

Today, I went to the dentist to get a hole in my tooth filled. After the dentist had injected the anesthetic into my gums, she realized that none of the electrical equipment were working. She sent me home. My entire right side of my face is completely numb and swollen for no reason. FML

by someone / 09/02/2009 at 7:00am / Denmark (Kobenhavn) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work in a lab. I spent all day growing a large bacterial culture. I went to retrieve it, only to find that someone had turned the incubation shaker up too high, and my flask had flown off and shattered. Not only did I lose all my work, but now the whole room is a biohazard. FML

by startingover / 07/18/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I ran into a girl I used to go to school with. We went out for dinner to catch up, and we ended up at my house, watching movies and cuddling. This fantastic and spontaneous date was concluded with several kisses. I dropped her off at her car and drove off. I forgot to get her number. FML

by PIRATE_ / 04/27/2009 at 3:21am / United States (Georgia) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.