About ImAFaker : Horror movies, video games, soccer, and football. Chat me up if you want. P.S. This is a comedy website, I don't care if you're feelings are hurt as long as it's funny. I may sound like an asshole but this is called comedy for a reason. I will check out your profile but sorry people, I have no fucks to give.
ImAFaker's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
ImAFaker's favorite FMLs
Today, I had my daughter babysit her 2-year-old brother while I went out with my husband. I told her not to let him out of her sight. She certainly did as I said; when I tuned into our internet-enabled baby monitor, I heard her and some guy having sex in the room. FML
by Anonymous / 08/26/2015 at 4:04am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML
by notwhatithought / 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/08/2015 at 8:03pm / United Kingdom (North Somerset) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/05/2015 at 1:56pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my friend offered to make me a playlist for the gym. I thought it was really thoughtful, until I started listening to it during my workout and realized that every single song was "Supersize Me" with the title changed. FML
by Anonymous / 08/02/2015 at 11:25pm / United States (Michigan) / Health
Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML
by funnnyyyyy -_- / 08/01/2015 at 4:29am / Nepal / Animals
by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 11:40am / Canada (Quebec) / Animals
Today, most of my family was out of the house, so I took the opportunity to go to the bathroom and browse some porn. Five minutes later my sister comes and asks me to disconnect from bluetooth and that my "dinosaur noises" were blocking her and her friend's music. I'm currently hiding in shame. FML
by Nigel / 07/13/2015 at 5:15pm / United States / Intimacy
by Steve97 / 07/13/2015 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I stayed over at my boyfriend's house for the first time. He soon found out about my sleep-talking habit. I started ranting about "electron shaming" and I apparently passionately support their "sub-atomic lifestyle". Yes, he managed to get it on video. FML
by wantmeasandwich / 07/10/2015 at 12:57pm / India (Maharashtra) / Miscellaneous
by PupZilla / 07/02/2015 at 10:08am / United States (Illinois) / Kids
by Anonymous / 06/23/2015 at 11:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to the sound of 4 gunshots from downstairs. I screamed, hid under the bed in tears and called the cops. Turned out my boyfriend hadn't been murdered by a burglar like I thought - he'd found a tarantula in our living room and decided to feed it a face full of lead. FML
by Anonymous / 06/19/2015 at 3:00pm / United States / Animals
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
by lehonX9 / 06/06/2015 at 5:11am / Germany (Niedersachsen) / Miscellaneous
Today, I bought my first vibrator. I was really excited, until my crippling OCD kicked in, forcing me to turn it on and off seven times in rapid succession, causing it to give off a cracking sound and stop working. Now I'm sad. FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2015 at 10:01am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy