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I_Am_Lamp_

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I_Am_Lamp_

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2027
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About I_Am_Lamp_ : Yes...come hither my dear child...into the realm of this dystopian website...

I_Am_Lamp_'s page activity

Visits<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 2:11am<b>TheWiseWolf</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:31pm<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:07am<b>nana_star</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 10:20am<b>Lagalette</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 12:11am<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:03pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 9:27pm<b>denaeb123</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 3:50pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:42pm<b>ChampHero</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 10:10am<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 2:45am<b>ironik69</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 12:24am<b>cmchappy</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 7:22am<b>thatoneguy1927</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 5:31pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:22am<b>Circles</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:03am<b>kennkenn13</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:57pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:02am

Liked!<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:03am<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:27am<b>ChampHero</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 4:10pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 5:02am<b>vampy719</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:01pm<b>xsydneyx123</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:22am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 5:46pm<b>thatsawkward7</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:39pm<b>Toolishing</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 4:11am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:19am

I_Am_Lamp_'s FML badges

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I_Am_Lamp_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

#21365639
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26375) - you deserved it (2818)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by mszoe - United States (California)

Today, I saw my grandma had registered on Facebook, so I wrote a welcome post on her wall. She replied "Delete." several times, then called me, accusing me of "hacking" her and demanding that I remove my name from her page at once. FML

#21364671
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27084) - you deserved it (2437)

On 02/27/2015 at 3:20pm - misc - by Y_Y (man) - United States

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26070) - you deserved it (2975)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27819) - you deserved it (3740)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32124) - you deserved it (2027)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34916) - you deserved it (4934)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my bed fell through my floor. With me on it. FML

#21352624
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34096) - you deserved it (3038)

On 02/09/2015 at 8:26am - misc - by wtf?? - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook of me at a club with some friends. The first comment it got was "Just got a stiffy. 10/10." Thanks for that, dad. FML

#21351395
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28748) - you deserved it (3060)

On 02/07/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by gali-ma (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34077) - you deserved it (3163)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

#21342882
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30586) - you deserved it (4140)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm - misc - by Annomymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I witnessed my husband in the shower singing Chicago's "You're the Inspiration" to his penis while manscaping. I guess that's a bond we'll never have. FML

#21342844
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26514) - you deserved it (3208)

On 01/23/2015 at 11:46am - intimacy - by LD - United States (Idaho)

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30343) - you deserved it (4254)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, my mom paid me a surprise visit me at my university dorm. She ended up rifling through my stuff and started to pull out a box from on top of my wardrobe. Before I could stop her, it slipped and fell. Today's forecast: 100% chance of dildo rain. FML

#21338507
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31778) - you deserved it (4515)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML



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