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I_Am_Lamp_

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I_Am_Lamp_

17Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2297
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About I_Am_Lamp_ : Yes...come hither my dear child...into the realm of this dystopian website...

I_Am_Lamp_'s page activity

Visits<b>FitFriday</b> - 9 hours ago<b>labaro19</b> - 24 hours ago<b>arasx0</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:19pm<b>amadeclton</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 10:44pm<b>jenamalone</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:14am<b>thatsawkward7</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:50pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 4:16am<b>Sassy_Kitten96</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 10:32pm<b>Cheerzz</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 5:06pm<b>EclipseCandy6</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:30pm<b>Scheffy213</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 12:54pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 11:09am<b>Threnody666</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:47pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 5:13pm<b>lellalove</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 4:06pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 4:06pm<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 2:48pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:03am

Liked!<b>jenamalone</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 9:14am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 9:16am<b>Sassy_Kitten96</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 3:33am<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:48pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 12:03pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 3:44am<b>shiffizzle</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:03am<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:03am<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:27am<b>ChampHero</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 4:10pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 5:02am<b>vampy719</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:01pm<b>xsydneyx123</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:22am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 5:46pm<b>thatsawkward7</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 11:39pm<b>Toolishing</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 4:11am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:19am

I_Am_Lamp_'s FML badges

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I_Am_Lamp_'s favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16642) - you deserved it (981)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML

#21380308
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28492) - you deserved it (2199)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:19pm - misc - by jumanji (man) -

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25313) - you deserved it (3086)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML

#21376642
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32010) - you deserved it (4192)

On 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm - misc - by Idigrespectfulattire (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31814) - you deserved it (2534)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

#21365639
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29522) - you deserved it (3074)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by mszoe - United States (California)

Today, I saw my grandma had registered on Facebook, so I wrote a welcome post on her wall. She replied "Delete." several times, then called me, accusing me of "hacking" her and demanding that I remove my name from her page at once. FML

#21364671
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29077) - you deserved it (2507)

On 02/27/2015 at 3:20pm - misc - by Y_Y (man) - United States

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29164) - you deserved it (3140)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28386) - you deserved it (3754)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32369) - you deserved it (2031)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35657) - you deserved it (4969)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my bed fell through my floor. With me on it. FML

#21352624
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34149) - you deserved it (3041)

On 02/09/2015 at 8:26am - misc - by wtf?? - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook of me at a club with some friends. The first comment it got was "Just got a stiffy. 10/10." Thanks for that, dad. FML

#21351395
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28790) - you deserved it (3062)

On 02/07/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by gali-ma (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35075) - you deserved it (3670)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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