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Offline (the 11/09/2016 at 8:25pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 3 May 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 4404
  • Number of comments : 107
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About HylianTwilight : I love my dog. I've lurked in FML for the past couple years, but never partook in the daily activities that seem to go along here. I may not be a regular commenter, but when I see fit to put in my opinion, I make it logical. I appreciate puns and tip my hat to those who can pull off multiples in one comment. Kudos! I'm a quiet sorta gal, and I don't appreciate rudeness. If one is rude to me, I dish it back out equally. But, I love a smile and laughter more. So smile!

HylianTwilight's page activity

Visits<b>cats4lyfe</b> - the 11/06/2016 at 1:21am<b>weedle99</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 8:48pm<b>TheHeirofTime</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:17pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 1:49am<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 10:21am<b>Angsty_Armadillo</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 4:03pm<b>alicat089</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 7:34pm<b>max367</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:56am<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 3:18am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 1:29am<b>BlueDinosaurs22</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 5:15pm<b>majestic_banana</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 11:54pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:37pm<b>aperron96</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 1:31am<b>LoverWordsFood</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 10:30am<b>philly860</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 7:47am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 9:51pm<b>Geary519</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 5:22pm

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 8:31pm<b>mds9986</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 10:27pm<b>ICantPickAUser</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 5:47pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 4:11am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 10:18am<b>crossdresseryau</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 7:39pm<b>kayana153</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 10:24pm<b>snowman5394</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:43am<b>allstarrider</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:52am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 1:14am<b>robertd73</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 2:32pm<b>rogwest</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 1:53pm

HylianTwilight's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of HylianTwilight's badges

HylianTwilight's favorite FMLs

Today, upon my arrival at work, I was greeted by 2 police officers, 2 managers, my coworker, and a meth-head in my office. They quickly told me that the meth-head was wearing stolen merchandise under her clothes, then left me alone with her, saying I had to watch her undress. FML

by Undercover_Agent / 05/25/2016 at 2:04am / United States (Iowa) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally went to the doctor's office to have a small patch of acne on my stomach looked at. Since it was in an almost perfect circle and abnormally sensitive, I was worried it could be ringworm or some other sort of skin infection. It turned out to be an infection alright. Herpes. FML

by ringrash / 01/14/2016 at 1:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by whatthefuck / 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, while I was working at a gas station, a man came up to the register with his zipper undone and his penis hanging out in full view. I had to awkwardly hand him his change while trying not to look or make eye contact. FML

by forever damaged / 12/20/2015 at 11:24pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I found out my girlfriend is a full-on, wants-to-be-banged-by-a-horse furry. FML

by Anonymous / 12/13/2015 at 6:47am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his parents' house when things started getting hot. Out of respect, we stopped and just cuddled, making us able to hear his parents banging. FML

by ph2222 / 10/05/2015 at 1:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my long-term girlfriend broke up with me because my hair "falls out" and I "will definitely be bald soon", even though it's not that bad. The same girl who I supported through her chemotherapy and gave her promises that I would stay with her no matter how she looked. FML

by lovedoesnotexist / 09/24/2015 at 7:52am / Belgium / Love

Today, I was with my girlfriend at lunch when a group of guys came over. They started calling her a whore and a bunch of other shit, so I cussed them out. Turns out she was not only cheating on me, but all the other guys too. FML

by Jgfenix / 09/21/2015 at 8:24pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2015 at 1:33pm / Romania (Giurgiu) / Animals

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I found out my girlfriend and all of our friends have begun referring to the time I was meant to lose my virginity, but couldn't get hard, as the "cheese stick incident." They all think it's hilarious, and the worst part is that it's actually a pretty appropriate description. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2014 at 5:45pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

by MySonThePoet / 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Love

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

by Jamestown of Vagina / 09/13/2014 at 10:36am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous