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HomeAl0ne

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HomeAl0ne
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8353
  • Number of comments : 1126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About HomeAl0ne : Ahhah! Caught you peeking. Don't pretend you were just vacuuming naked and slipped and accidentally clicked on my nickname.....

OK, so what do you want to know, hmmm?

Yes, I'm really 52. Yes, I understand that seems improbable. Yes, I understand that the interwebs is for young people and that this makes me a creeper. Yes, I understand that I certainly shouldn't be using smiley faces and 'lol'. Yes, I understand that I must be lying about this, because otherwise you'd believe me.

If you'd like to find out anything else, or just drop by for a yarn, send me a PM.

HomeAl0ne's last visitors

zoecwmaggiefoxJarl_the_Eliteumidontremberalexmac222buckdharmaButterflyHaze

HomeAl0ne's FML badges

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of HomeAl0ne's badges

HomeAl0ne's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML

#17250401
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31339) - you deserved it (8034)

On 07/25/2011 at 3:21am - health - by jgdgjyfg - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I put 7 kisses at the end of a text instead of 10. She said that our relationship was bound to fail if "I can't remember important things like that". FML

#17227486
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40425) - you deserved it (5127)

On 07/23/2011 at 7:00am - love - by Baconcook3000 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was discussing the traffic with my brother. He said the most common car colour is red. I said it was black. We ended up betting €100 on which three vehicles of either colour would pass by our house first. It seems a convoy of fire trucks had somewhere to be in a hurry. FML

#17221659
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24849) - you deserved it (8102) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/22/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by zerom - France

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46704) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35759) - you deserved it (5026)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33936) - you deserved it (5071)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, my step dad stole over $400 worth of savings from me. He spent it on alcohol, fireworks, and a very large sombrero. FML

#17161191
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32779) - you deserved it (3497)

On 07/18/2011 at 9:08am - misc - by _TaToRtOt_ (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML

#17106852
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17360) - you deserved it (1378)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:25am - work - by Breanne - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my mother started dating a man who insists people call him 'Panda'. FML

#17092208
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25827) - you deserved it (2021)

On 07/13/2011 at 9:11am - misc - by butimarealbear (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117109) - you deserved it (5934)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66635) - you deserved it (6939)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

#17080358
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36869) - you deserved it (21188)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm - misc - by couldntholdit (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my father spent half an hour trying to convert my cat to Christianity. He has already done this with my other two cats. He's completely serious and thinks they are born-again Christians. FML

#17072330
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (2605)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML

#16965226
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37889) - you deserved it (2417)

On 07/03/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by beablue18 - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30574) - you deserved it (2965)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



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