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Holmes27

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Holmes27

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 April 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 592
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Holmes27's page activity

Visits<b>Aquamarine9</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 5:06pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:52am<b>luminalunii69</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:46pm<b>rncannon</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 5:49pm<b>WCARlover</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:50pm<b>sophiurr</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 6:44pm<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 11:14am<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 1:30am<b>Camille0498</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 8:38am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 7:37pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 4:21pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 2:41am

Holmes27's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Holmes27's badges

Holmes27's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45728) - you deserved it (7793)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60713) - you deserved it (7707)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, after getting a root canal, I told my mother how boring it was just sitting there with my mouth open for ages while the dentist did his work. She then told me how she had to do the same kind of thing on her anniversary night with my father. FML

#20968136
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45558) - you deserved it (4556)

On 11/23/2013 at 4:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Argentina

Today, I got my dad to fill in a questionnaire my teacher handed out on Friday. One question said "I would like to see my son/daughter ______." My dad wrote in the blank: "less often." FML

#20961005
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47645) - you deserved it (4127)

On 11/17/2013 at 3:27pm - kids - by :( (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

#20849713
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42935) - you deserved it (13820)

On 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm - animals - by violated ._. (woman) - United States

Today, after a church service, a man approached me as I was walking to my car. He had tears in his eyes and politely asked if I would pray with him. He asked if we could hold hands. As I reached out to hold his hands, the bitch snatched my purse and ran. FML

#20797008
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47250) - you deserved it (8277)

On 07/22/2013 at 3:09am - misc - by HillaryAngelic (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents finally got married. At the after-party, my mother got drunk and informed me that even though she and my father were now married, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still a bastard. FML

#20631493
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44302) - you deserved it (3387)

On 04/29/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by SierraCheyenne (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

#20617598
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52602) - you deserved it (21490)

On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - kids - by BIGCHEIFAAA (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32883) - you deserved it (113058)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, the people fixing my phone called to say that for some reason, my phone's SIM card has wiped all my contacts except for four, and they are doing their best to try and recover the rest. I had to explain to them that I only had four contacts to begin with. The guy laughed. FML

#20567905
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40907) - you deserved it (5270)

On 03/31/2013 at 3:00am - misc - by Mr.no contacts (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50552) - you deserved it (4849)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39074) - you deserved it (9446)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54677) - you deserved it (17390)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33350) - you deserved it (4475)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

#17298828
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31581) - you deserved it (5956)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (South Carolina)



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