About HitTheRoadJacK3 : The answer is always world peace, if not, try Jesus.
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HitTheRoadJacK3's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 03/24/2016 at 11:23am / United States (Ohio) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/05/2016 at 12:57am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I really had to pee during one of my college lectures. I finally worked up the nerve to leave the room while he was lecturing, and ran frantically to the bathroom. Once in there, the urge intensified to the point I couldn't hold it. I peed my pants while standing in the bathroom. FML
by Peepants / 03/03/2016 at 6:03pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I donated a dollar to a kids charity at Lowe's. The cashier handed me a star to sign my name, I signed it and gave it back to her. She looked at me with disgust and asked what was wrong with me. I had to pull out my license to prove to her that my name is really Michael Myers. FML
by M1CHA3L_MY3RZ / 03/01/2016 at 8:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after having my husband ask if I 'had any plans' for the weekend, and him mentioning that he got me something special, he played his PS4 for hours, ignored me, then finally took a break to hand me a tiny box of chocolates. I can't even be mad because he looked so proud. FML
by marriedbutlonely / 02/14/2016 at 9:36pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by koolkat9 / 12/22/2014 at 2:11pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
Today, I went to the dry-cleaner's and went to get my bag of laundry from my trunk, but I ended up dropping the bag. My dirty underwear blew around the parking lot. I had to chase it all down as a bunch of people looked on. FML
by embarrassed / 12/19/2014 at 2:24pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by yus / 10/21/2014 at 3:46pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, near the end end of my shift as a bartender, a drunk man stumbled into my bar, got upset because I refused to serve him, puked into my tip jar, then offered me half a pack of cigarettes in exchange for sex. FML
by Bartender / 10/20/2014 at 5:04pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by how about never? / 10/19/2014 at 7:22am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, the steroids I was prescribed for a slightly irritating sinus infection have worked, albeit at the price of making me almost shit my pants multiple times. My sinuses are now clear enough that I get the full scent of my steroid-induced diarrhea. FML
by roidrager / 10/16/2014 at 12:44pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by datgurllllukno / 10/15/2014 at 2:26am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a massage. I guess I hit the spot, because he muttered, "Please marry me" into the pillow. Considering we've been going out for years and had spoken about marriage before, I stopped in my tracks. He stammered, "Oh, I mean... Not like that. Will you keep going?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2014 at 7:41pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/30/2014 at 1:45pm / United States (Oregon) / Love
by piper182 / 09/29/2014 at 6:04pm / United States (New York) / Love
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…