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His_Holiness

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His_Holiness

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3621
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About His_Holiness : All hail my holy balls

Give me your sons as payment for me being the voice of God

His_Holiness's page activity

Visits<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 4:55pm<b>perfect_insanity</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 9:41am<b>Jessj958</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:38pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 4:25pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 7:32pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 4:16pm<b>pandas91210</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 7:28pm<b>Candycake</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 12:23pm<b>842wolves</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 9:33pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 11:11am<b>zackerytb</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 6:21am<b>LaurenJadeK</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 12:24am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:21am<b>Adiedee</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 1:54pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 11:09pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 12:18pm<b>kingcheese</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 11:57pm<b>tralala453</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 9:50am

His_Holiness's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of His_Holiness's badges

His_Holiness's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on my way home from a friends house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

#194766
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99343) - you deserved it (6231)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:20am - intimacy - by hlev24 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27857) - you deserved it (96307)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I babysat a five year old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML

#159589
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18961) - you deserved it (88282)

On 02/28/2009 at 5:59am - kids - by tryena (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

#38789
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51283) - you deserved it (8260)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Shamu (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

#2729
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49468) - you deserved it (2587)

On 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm - health - by Noname - Japan (Fukuoka)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17281) - you deserved it (72066)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, I went to Target to buy some soap and this 65-70 year old woman next to me was asking a sales associate if they had any bubble bath mix. I suddenly pictured her naked, bathing herself and suddenly my dick just couldn't sit still. It's probably because I haven't had sex in over 22 months. FML

#2281
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27002) - you deserved it (10921)

On 01/23/2009 at 3:36am - intimacy - by fecurtis - United States (Virginia)



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