About Hello9875 : Serious eating issues, lovely metabolism *insert sarcasm* Self proclaimed songwriter, music & book lover, fucked up sense of humor. I've had a huge crush on Chris Pine since I can remember :) Pretty bored, so if you are too feel free to message me! :)
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Hello9875's favorite FMLs
by ColoredPencil13 / 05/10/2014 at 9:35am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by romancocks / 05/09/2014 at 4:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brain-dead brother-in-law decided to play five finger fillet while at my place. Predictably, he ended up slicing a finger wide open. My mother-in-law now wants my blood, because she thinks I dared him to do it, and that clearly her perfect little angel couldn't be such a moron. FML
by fmlgirl / 05/09/2014 at 2:44pm / Netherlands (Zeeland) / Miscellaneous
by unlovedmommy / 05/08/2014 at 5:49pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML
by Zekrome / 05/05/2014 at 3:53am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by nh-Amazon / 04/27/2014 at 7:01pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by ewhy / 04/23/2014 at 2:37pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I got to spend 4 hours on a bus with a group of selfie-taking teenagers who spent the majority of the time trying to harmonize while singing various songs. I'm pretty sure half of them were tone deaf. FML
by please stop singing!!!! / 03/21/2014 at 7:59pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation
Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML
by systematicpanic / 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Work
by outthelabyrynth / 03/17/2014 at 3:41pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Work
by dyingangel246 / 03/05/2014 at 5:15am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML
by anonymous / 03/05/2014 at 12:43am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by meandme / 03/04/2014 at 5:55pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
Today, while walking through Wal-Mart I noticed a cute employee. With a sudden burst of confidence, I walked right up to him, intending to ask for his number. Instead, I looked him in the eye and said, "Excuse me sir, how much do you know about bedsheets?" and then ran. FML
by booksandshadows / 03/04/2014 at 4:06am / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/03/2014 at 11:30am / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…