Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

HelenKeller1

Offline (one hour ago) | Search for a member

HelenKeller1

29Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7344
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 17, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>TheDog6</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Scubanaut</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 12:12am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 1:38am<b>jqmalang</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 3:45pm<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 2:46pm<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:57am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 5:17pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 4:59pm<b>youngmessi252525</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 8:53pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 8:10am<b>Penialboywonder</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 1:20am<b>ligerzero459</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:19pm<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 9:31pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:03pm<b>moron011</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:07pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:47pm<b>tilly_llama</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:08am

Fucked!<b>demonte_jones</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 2:49am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:55pm<b>TheDog6</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:18am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:17am<b>Joshery</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 7:50pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:13am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:32pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:37am<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 7:21am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:01pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 2:39pm<b>allred1997</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 8:30am<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 11:15pm<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 11:35am<b>nomrana</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 4:35am<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 10:14pm<b>bigjake</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 10:51pm

HelenKeller1's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43583) - you deserved it (27811)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my coworkers and I were comparing the backgrounds we have on our phones. They pretty much sum up our love lives; everyone else's background is a photo of their boyfriend or girlfriend. Mine's a photo of a lifeless desert. FML

#21235038
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36446) - you deserved it (4468) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/11/2014 at 3:05pm - love - by Fennec (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55179) - you deserved it (22944)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

#21231691
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27788) - you deserved it (39932)

On 08/07/2014 at 11:36am - health - by Dancing King (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I had to give a video presentation. My video was on animal abuse, but I somehow played a video of myself singing Britney Spears in my room. FML

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49369) - you deserved it (21309)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63867) - you deserved it (8263)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42962) - you deserved it (6239)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I realized that when a girl asks what your plans are for Valentine's Day and you say "nothing" and she responds with, "Oh, I don't have any plans either", it means she wants you to take her out. Took me three months to figure that out. FML

#21145130
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35589) - you deserved it (55523)

On 05/19/2014 at 1:15pm - love - by clueless - United States (California)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67214) - you deserved it (4971)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

#21139495
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46997) - you deserved it (10665)

On 05/14/2014 at 9:12am - health - by thanks4support - United States (Ohio)

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

#21138987
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23549) - you deserved it (67622)

On 05/13/2014 at 7:46pm - health - by ShutTheFuCupcake (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML

#21138042
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56078) - you deserved it (7162)

On 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm - love - by nofatchicks (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, some girl in the street mistook me for Richard Simmons. FML

#21134956
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34653) - you deserved it (5503)

On 05/09/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by romancocks - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39126) - you deserved it (20935)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: