Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

HelenKeller1

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

HelenKeller1

29Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 7305
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 17, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>jqmalang</b> - 6 hours ago<b>JessMac9000</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Yazoo77</b> - 20 hours ago<b>hotheadslav</b> - yesterday at 5:17pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - yesterday at 4:59pm<b>youngmessi252525</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 8:53pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 8:10am<b>Penialboywonder</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 1:20am<b>ligerzero459</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:19pm<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 9:31pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:03pm<b>moron011</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:07pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:47pm<b>tilly_llama</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:08am<b>TheDog6</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 11:55pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 3:42pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 3:16am

Fucked!<b>demonte_jones</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 2:49am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:55pm<b>TheDog6</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:18am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:17am<b>Joshery</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 7:50pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:13am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:32pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:37am<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 7:21am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:01pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 2:39pm<b>allred1997</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 8:30am<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 11:15pm<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 11:35am<b>nomrana</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 4:35am<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 10:14pm<b>bigjake</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 10:51pm

HelenKeller1's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39661) - you deserved it (10633)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got in an argument with my teacher for always comparing me to my sister that she had a few years before. After I said, "I'm not my sister so please stop comparing me to her," she responded, "Of course you're not your sister, I actually like your sister." FML

#21283210
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35389) - you deserved it (5395)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:55pm - misc - by Not so much of a teachers pet - United States

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML

#21283103
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31548) - you deserved it (6338)

On 10/22/2014 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML

#21281604
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38580) - you deserved it (2792)

On 10/20/2014 at 5:28am - intimacy - by bye loser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML

#21281374
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32335) - you deserved it (3041)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:20pm - kids - by team hit bella with a car (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32359) - you deserved it (5303)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33009) - you deserved it (15453)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

#21271187
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36919) - you deserved it (3967)

On 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31897) - you deserved it (18303)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I saw my teacher using her phone in the middle of class, so to joke around with her, seeing as we're on pretty good terms, I said: "Using your phone in class? For shame." She looks me in the eyes and says, "Would it be ok if I told you I'm arranging my father's funeral?" FML

#21256116
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45114) - you deserved it (16903)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:33am - misc - by lolwut - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

#21243572
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54222) - you deserved it (5409)

On 08/23/2014 at 2:26am - intimacy - by confidence taken - United States (Mississippi)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53040) - you deserved it (9050)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16082) - you deserved it (76168)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, I was chatting with the cute new receptionist at the gym. I told her that I would be going there more if she was there. She looked me up and down and said that I should go regardless. FML

#21237096
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35249) - you deserved it (14492)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:46pm - health - by fatty (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43573) - you deserved it (27809)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: