HelenKeller1

Search for a member

Online

HelenKeller1

81Fucked!

HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9388
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 18, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012
I work at Red Lobster 💁 22 piercings & counting.

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>infernno</b> - 2 hours ago<b>bigwell</b> - 20 hours ago<b>wanted_2_want</b> - yesterday at 1:26am<b>OmgimBored</b> - yesterday at 9:35pm<b>xlJOEY</b> - yesterday at 6:49pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - yesterday at 7:50am<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 12:13am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:34pm<b>juanakacamilo</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 4:47pm<b>ChugTheBleach</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:47pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:26am<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 4:49pm<b>laynethefirst</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 4:01pm<b>Roostermann25</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:50am<b>duduv2</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 11:46pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 6:21pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 8:03pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 8:37pm

Fucked!<b>OmgimBored</b> - 24 hours ago<b>ChugTheBleach</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:47pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 2:44pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 5:26am<b>fastman19</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 12:50pm<b>DeadxManxWalking</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 4:27pm<b>rwal0912</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 3:12pm<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 9:13am<b>Roostermann25</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 6:53pm<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 10:05pm<b>infernno</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 7:05am<b>papa_vas</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 3:06am<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 11:44pm<b>BstMode</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 9:16am<b>A07</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:51am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 9:19pm<b>Mattyjay13</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 2:33pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 1:48pm

HelenKeller1's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife and I were having sex when she suddenly stopped and said, "I just thought of a great lesson plan idea for my 3rd graders." This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2016 at 5:19pm / Intimacy

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

by uninvited / 02/04/2016 at 10:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I heard some gossip at school about a weird kid who supposedly jerks off at every house he visits. They were talking about my brother. FML

by concernedsis / 02/04/2016 at 9:53am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML

by :x / 02/03/2016 at 10:40am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the gym. I'm 360 lbs and have finally decided it's time to change that. Some girl and her two bitch friends thought it'd be fun to follow me and belittle me at everything I did. When I mentioned it to the staff, they said that they were just "encouraging" me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2016 at 5:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I called the cops on my elderly neighbor for blaring loud war music yet again. They chatted and laughed with him on his lawn for a good half hour. As they left, he slapped the female officer's ass, only for her to just giggle about it. After they drove off, he fired up his music again. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2016 at 12:07am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

by sweetie808 / 01/28/2016 at 3:39am / United States (Hawaii) / Animals

Today, a customer scared me for the sole purpose of watching my breasts jiggle when I jumped in surprise. I know because his head moved as they did, and he said, "Nice." before walking away. FML

by NotYourToy / 01/27/2016 at 2:59am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, it was the first day in my life that I fell into a toilet because someone left the toilet seat up. I'm a guy. FML

by lookwhereyasittin / 01/24/2016 at 12:47pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

by Dexter_39476 / 01/24/2016 at 12:40am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 6:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2016 at 1:41pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, on my college visit, I met a perfect girl for me, sweet, gorgeous, on the same career path. I remember everything we talked about, where she is from, what sport she plays, and her recent internship. But when I went to look her up online, I couldn't remember one thing, her name. FML

by Roll Tide of Tears / 01/16/2016 at 10:28pm / United States / Love

Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2016 at 1:40am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend and we passed the shop where my ex works at. My boyfriend slapped my ass right as my ex came out. It was so sudden that I started choking on a fry and dropped soda all over myself. My ex kept laughing all while my boyfriend kept apologizing. FML

by Gamergirl137 / 01/15/2016 at 9:28pm / United States (California) / Love