HelenKeller1

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HelenKeller1

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HelenKeller1HelenKeller1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 August 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12546
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HelenKeller1 : Lindsey, 19, 😘💋 snapchat; meatloaf2012
I work at Red Lobster 💁🏻

HelenKeller1's page activity

Visits<b>10nachoman10</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Generalleroy</b> - the 12/06/2016 at 12:33am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 9:58pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 4:04pm<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 2:25pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 12:04pm<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 11:26pm<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 4:10pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 8:42am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/03/2016 at 11:37pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 11:35pm<b>james08</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 2:36pm<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 5:48am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 2:21pm<b>notmedo</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 4:51am<b>ChristDesi</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 2:02am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 11/24/2016 at 12:42pm<b>Chris_1414</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 7:37am

Fucked!<b>Generalleroy</b> - the 12/06/2016 at 6:34am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 5:35am<b>tengo</b> - the 11/19/2016 at 6:17am<b>Nolimit22177</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 10:06pm<b>orios105</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 8:26pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 8:19pm<b>2simz</b> - the 11/06/2016 at 4:12am<b>jaysoccer27</b> - the 10/26/2016 at 6:35am<b>Chris_1414</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 2:03pm<b>vaas90</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 12:34pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 10/18/2016 at 3:01pm<b>hunter1019</b> - the 10/16/2016 at 11:19pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 10/10/2016 at 4:35pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 4:17am<b>Ih8teenageangst</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 10:56pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 6:09am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:52am<b>notmedo</b> - the 10/06/2016 at 4:40pm

HelenKeller1's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of HelenKeller1's badges

HelenKeller1's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my ex bragging to his buddies about how freaky his new girlfriend is, what with her animal tail butt plugs and such. Towards the end of our relationship, he called me disgusting for suggesting we spice things up with handcuffs. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2016 at 1:15pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my "girlfriend" is only with me for free transportation. She even has my contact saved as the car emoji. FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2016 at 9:48am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, my husband and I both got smart watches. We were running around, acting like we were in a James Bond movie, having fun. Until our neighbors called the cops on us for hiding in their bushes. FML

by nykkymcallister / 05/18/2016 at 11:07pm / United States (Maryland) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I nearly got shitcanned for falling asleep on the job. The only reason I was so dead tired was because my idiot roommates decided to get high last night and loudly argue for hours about stupid crap like "Is it gay to screw a clone of yourself?" I got less than 2 hours of sleep because of them. FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2016 at 11:18pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I've been begging my boyfriend to get us a dog for months now. This morning, I noticed he'd bought some toilet paper with dogs printed on it. I asked him if it was a sign. He replied, "Yeah, one you can stick up your ass." FML

by Confession / 05/15/2016 at 10:07pm / Belgium / Animals

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

by hadrienne's pall / 05/13/2016 at 3:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I went on a date with my long time crush of three years. Everything was going great, until I found out he supports Donald Trump. FML

by anon / 05/10/2016 at 9:30pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't know much about the USA, and two, they now believe it's proper manners to shout, "FREEEEDOM" before ending a call with me. FML

by Chin... uh.... / 05/10/2016 at 6:42pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I realized why my dad got mad when he found out that my girlfriend and I have sex. Turns out he's jealous because he thinks she's hot, and wishes he was the one sleeping with her. FML

by seriouslydad / 05/08/2016 at 9:11am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, while shopping, I told my wife I'd love some pork chops for dinner. Someone nearby muttered, "That's practically cannibalism, ya fat pig." My wife immediately had a "coughing attack" that sounded suspiciously like it was covering up laughter. FML

by dempasi / 05/06/2016 at 2:51pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend keeps requesting that I make eye contact when I give him blowjobs. He won't let up about it. I don't know how to break it to him that his penis is too small for me to suck and look upward at the same time. FML

by oh gee / 05/02/2016 at 1:01am / Intimacy

Today, I found a love letter in my mail. It was from a girl I met at a bar few weeks ago. I never gave her my address or last name. I guess I have a stalker now. FML

by Stalked / 04/29/2016 at 4:49am / Czech Republic (Jihomoravsky kraj) / Love

Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Turns out we only have one thing in common: we would both bang Hillary Clinton. FML

by Anon / 04/28/2016 at 4:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I did the math and discovered that every year, I pay the equivalent cost of a luxury car to a college that can't even keep rats out of the dorms. FML

by Dashofweak / 04/26/2016 at 12:17pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, my ex-best friend, who I haven't spoken to in a year because of how obsessive she got, posted a picture of herself with dyed brown hair and glasses. We look like twins. Even I thought it was me. Some people are commenting that I look beautiful. School starts tomorrow. FML

by exiebestie / 04/25/2016 at 9:30pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous