About HarryF18 : I love soccer, asian and most other foods, fml, ifunny and AWESOMENESS!!!
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HarryF18's favorite FMLs
Today, a child was choking in the store I work at. He was alone in the aisle, so I started the Heimlich without his parents' permission. After dislodging what was caught, his mother turned the corner and went screaming to my manager for touching her kid. I got a write up. FML
by justwantingtohelp / 08/16/2013 at 1:02am / United States (Michigan) / Kids
Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML
by vmml97 / 08/01/2013 at 12:32am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML
by ktiskool / 08/01/2013 at 12:03am / United States (Missouri) / Kids
Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML
by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Kids
Today, I went to my dad, hoping to confess something to him. He quickly said that if I'd got my girlfriend pregnant, he'd kill me. That's exactly what happened. I had to make up a lie instead about stealing $50 from his wallet once as a kid, which he then demanded I pay back in full. FML
by psychic parents, how do they work? :( / 07/31/2013 at 6:49pm / United States (Illinois) / Money
by -_____- / 07/31/2013 at 5:23pm / Netherlands / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 12:49pm / United States (California) / Love
by Bnewlove / 07/31/2013 at 12:50am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
by TheSacredTeddyBear / 07/30/2013 at 11:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by nela25 / 07/30/2013 at 1:51pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, I was in the shower, oblivious to the outside world, when four police officers who had apparently been banging at my door, entered by force. They were doing a bust on a weed farm and got the wrong house. FML
by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML
by kiwichick4life / 07/30/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I called to confirm the appointment that I made over six months ago at the tattoo studio. Turns out my particular artist "doesn't work Tuesdays" and that they also miraculously have no record of my appointment, nor the cash deposit I had to put down. FML
by pittman137 / 07/30/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (Idaho) / Money
by kayak probs / 07/30/2013 at 10:13am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my mother decided to share with me that my father is impotent, and they hadn't had sex in a… Today, I found out the pet name my girlfriend gave my penis wasn't randomly made up after all; it's… Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and…
- Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me… Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the…