Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

GwennaRose

Search for a member

GwennaRose
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 April 1992 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 461
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About GwennaRose : I'm a senior in college, graduating with a degree in psychology, dance minor, and an art minor.

I'm a working photographer and dance teacher as well as a local crew worker for shows like KISS and Mumford & Sons. If I ever go to graduate school it will probably be for biology or engineering.

If you have any questions just ask, I'm generally a pretty chill person

GwennaRose's last visitors

ml_augustusArni792acidicthinkingqwertydude1andy594328daffidwildeTJRou09olpallytrickmick12FilbertMoo

GwennaRose's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of GwennaRose's badges

GwennaRose's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50136) - you deserved it (2939)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realised that I've never been able to successfully cook a meal outside of World of Warcraft. FML

#20841839
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22513) - you deserved it (34318)

On 08/17/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Thailand (Nonthaburi)

Today, I gave my daughter the sex talk. Barely 10 minutes later, her public Facebook status read: "My mom's a total pedo." and after she mentioned the talk, her friend posted, "That's sexual harassment. You can sue for that." Clearly I've failed as a parent. FML

#20840603
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46737) - you deserved it (4792)

On 08/16/2013 at 5:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

#20840053
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39478) - you deserved it (2867)

On 08/16/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by hipster glasses - United States

Today, during an otherwise promising job interview, I was asked how much I thought was too much for a "good hit of blow". I must have stayed speechless for too long, because the guy's next words were, "Yeah, you're not cut out for this." I'm shocked and baffled too. FML

#20825212
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36397) - you deserved it (3358)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44186) - you deserved it (20773)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, my apparently braindead and now ex-boyfriend asked me if "this period thing" is going to happen a lot, and said that if it is, "we're so done." FML

#20824199
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48501) - you deserved it (4235)

On 08/06/2013 at 5:55pm - love - by Crouching Tiger, Hidden Retard (woman) - United States

Today, my 18-year-old daughter texted me and told me that she got in a car crash. She texted, "I forgot wich way wus left lol" and then quickly added "yolo right? Lol". FML

#20814697
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53828) - you deserved it (8957)

On 08/01/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by father of the year - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

#20806809
118 comments

Today, my 11-year-old daughter heard the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

#20784969
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48225) - you deserved it (4229)

On 07/15/2013 at 8:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was teaching my daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down and let a green car merge in front of us. She said, "Fuck the green car" and sped up, colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. FML

#20783255
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46700) - you deserved it (5609)

On 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML

#20782878
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33272) - you deserved it (4278)

On 07/14/2013 at 9:07pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

#20749220
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22730) - you deserved it (29202)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by blahblah (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a wasp flew into my car. In my frantic attempt to get away from it, I got pulled over and had to prove I was driving sober. FML

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

#20723435
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53481) - you deserved it (3992)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by Hannah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: