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Greenmarsh

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Greenmarsh
  • Town/Country : Sydney/Canberra, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 July 1970 (43 years)
  • Number of visits : 2651
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About Greenmarsh : I do stuff

Greenmarsh's last visitors

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You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Greenmarsh's favorite FMLs

Today, after a week of searching, I found my escaped snake. In my umbrella, outside, after opening it over my head. FML

Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML

#17431204
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29487) - you deserved it (4043)

On 08/10/2011 at 5:10pm - love - by 6u174r_d00d - United States

Today, while sleeping, I heard an explosion. My neighbor then knocked on my door and informed me that he had just hit my car with shrapnel from a cannon. Not only do I not have a car to drive, but I also have to put this claim on my insurance due to my neighbor being on welfare. FML

Today, I hit a dead deer that had been left in the middle of the road. My car started to make a funny noise and smell, so I pulled over to check it, thinking I blew the tire on some antlers. The deer got stuck in my front wheel, and I'd dragged it more than a mile. And it wasn't actually dead. FML

#14658044
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17501) - you deserved it (39225)

On 01/21/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent the morning in the ER with a broken arm. My little brother was in such a rush to get his presents first, that he violently shoved me out of the way on the stairs. FML

#14335175
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22931) - you deserved it (2054)

On 12/25/2010 at 1:33pm - misc - by Connor - United States (New York)

Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML

#14136075
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28678) - you deserved it (1959)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:26pm - work - by grossedout (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I refused to ride with a friend on a motorcycle because it is unsafe and went to take the bus. As I got off the bus, I got hit by a speeding motorcycle and ended up in hospital. FML

#14026959
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26184) - you deserved it (4734)

On 11/29/2010 at 7:25pm - health - by leilei (woman) - Philippines

Today, my family went to a football game. It was a little cold, but then it started to rain. I wasn't dressed for rain and I'd left my umbrella in the car. My dad wouldn't let us leave our seats for the whole game. FML

#13754254
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15244) - you deserved it (4185)

On 11/07/2010 at 4:24pm - misc - by kaitlintaylor (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to lick the excess peanut butter off the knife after making a PB and J. Turns out the knife can and will cut your tongue, even though you don't think it will. FML

#11151626
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8857) - you deserved it (53857)

On 06/12/2010 at 6:13pm - health - by bobby - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend at the store, holding hands with his very pregnant girlfriend. They were buying baby supplies. We had a very nasty and painful breakup not even three months ago. FML

#9186653
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33141) - you deserved it (2574)

On 03/18/2010 at 12:48pm - love - by YouAREthefather (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I called out "personal" from work because I had to study for a major test that is taking place tomorrow. An hour later my manager called to fire me for "not taking work seriously", then I got an email that the test is being postponed. FML

#9081511
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21111) - you deserved it (3332)

On 03/14/2010 at 7:13pm - work - by Laurendorcus - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the pharmacy and asked the very attractive pharmacist what to do about the terrible itching under my cast. She told me to be a man and deal with it. FML

#8797696
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15973) - you deserved it (5755)

On 03/03/2010 at 11:46am - health - by brokenarm (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I am that loser. FML

#7133599
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26205) - you deserved it (4330)

On 01/03/2010 at 9:38pm - love - by birthday bash - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was on the bus and a woman got on with her 3 young children. I offered her my seat so they could all sit together. When I went to get off the bus I realized I left my bag underneath my old seat. When I tried to get it back the woman hit me and yelled at me for trying to steal her purse. FML

#6738092
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23411) - you deserved it (2129)

On 12/13/2009 at 12:30pm - misc - by gabby (woman) - Canada

Today, I went to my little cousin's school to pick her up and it happened to be my old elementary school. I saw my old teacher and went up to say hi, and after a few minutes she goes "Aren't you the girl who's dad always came in drunk on parent's day?" Nice to know that's how I'm remembered. FML

#6714593
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24057) - you deserved it (2143)

On 12/11/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by Childhood (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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