Greenmarsh

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Offline (the 08/28/2014 at 5:22am)

Greenmarsh

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 July 1970 (45 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 21920
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About Greenmarsh : I do stuff

Greenmarsh's page activity

Visits<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 12:17am<b>Druu</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 12:16am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 10:33pm<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 9:42pm<b>stepper99k</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 12:55am<b>XxLegitxXPanda</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 2:44pm<b>katertott</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 4:09am<b>skyturtle</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 7:48pm<b>osagsag</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 7:34am<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 5:04am<b>straww</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 3:34am<b>imabassist</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:54am<b>budnut</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:03am<b>hannahsnyder69</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 7:49am<b>KeannaLove</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 6:53am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 3:22am<b>MiissAshleyy</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 5:34am<b>jimbobpete</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 6:12am

Fucked!<b>stepper99k</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 6:33am

Greenmarsh's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Greenmarsh's favorite FMLs

Today, trying to flirt with a girl, I was trying to make it out as if I had a great sex life. I got stuck between saying "100% customer satisfaction" and "no complaints" and blurted out "100% customer complaints." FML

by MarkQ95 / 07/21/2013 at 7:58pm / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

by Not Mrs Soprano / 07/08/2013 at 7:57am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my girlfriend has recently become obsessed with the serial-killer show, Dexter, she has grown an interest in cutting up pomegranates in many different ways and squirting the red, blood-like juice everywhere. I am now afraid to argue with her. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 7:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML

by B-Rad / 11/15/2012 at 12:48am / United States / Love

Today, in a training class, I got to see a picture of what can happen when a man does not wear a safety harness correctly. For those of you who are unaware, male body parts are easily severed by loose straps. I cannot un-see that picture. It wasn't even a harness safety class. FML

by recmonty / 05/16/2012 at 11:53pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I've been diagnosed with a severe lung infection. This causes me to viciously hack up a lung every two minutes or so. Not only can I barely breathe as it is, my job requires lots of running around, cleaning and interacting with customers. I have a five-hour shift tonight. FML

by MissMae93 / 04/25/2012 at 9:27pm / United States / Health

Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML

by suhleedah18 / 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after being filled with joy after seeing my very elderly cat finally enjoying the sun in my garden, I skipped over to give her a hug. Turns out she was taking a shit. FML

by Ew. / 04/09/2012 at 11:22am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2012 at 1:52am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got the guts to text this cute girl at school. I started sending flirtatious texts, only to find out the hard way that she'd given me her boyfriend's number. FML

by Mark Allan / 03/25/2012 at 12:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, after finally getting my newborn baby to sleep, I made a sign to put on the door asking people not to knock or ring the bell, since our 3 dogs will bark loudly and wake the baby. When I went to print the sign, my dogs barked like crazy at the sound of the printer. FML

by TiredMom / 02/16/2012 at 4:42pm / United States (Louisiana) / Kids

Today, I had to do community service work, so I helped out at a senior center. One of the confused elderly patients, who believed the Cold War was still on, thought I was a Soviet and started screaming about how I was going to nuke his country. FML

by communistgirl / 01/24/2012 at 11:42am / United States / Work

Today, I saw a naked man for the first time in my life. It was the nude model in my art class. I was forced to draw wrinkles and fat rolls in places I didn't even know existed. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2012 at 5:13pm / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor's office. People kept staring at me and I couldn't figure out why. Later, I realized my sister's puppies had chewed a noticeable hole in my pants' crotch. FML

by Angela / 01/04/2012 at 2:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend I wouldn't be able to get any time off work to go to Mexico with him, and that we'd have to get our tickets refunded, and reschedule. He said not to bother, and that he already had someone else in mind to take with him. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2011 at 4:35pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love