About GossipGirlBitch : Cats need love too.
GossipGirlBitch's FML badges
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
GossipGirlBitch's favorite FMLs
Today, I had an argument with my boyfriend who was accusing me of only being in a relationship with him because I'd fantasised about being with an Asian. When I told him he was wrong, he asked me what attracted me to him in the first place. "Your eyes" was definitely the wrong answer. FML
Today, a customer complained he never got his sandwich, even though I put it in the oven, dressed it up and served it to him. When I went to clear his table off, I saw the sandwich basket. We had to give him his money back. FML
by okay / 07/22/2015 at 12:58am / United States (Georgia) / Kids
by Mr_snuggels / 12/24/2014 at 3:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
Today, someone commented on my mother's memorial page on my blog. It said "u need too get over it bitch" and "ur mum was a wh0re". I looked up the IP address and found the comment was posted from my own wifi. The only other person who lives in my house is my girlfriend. FML
by Anonymous / 11/12/2014 at 12:21pm / United Kingdom (Redcar and Cleveland) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/06/2014 at 7:28pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by baconandkittens / 02/25/2012 at 10:13pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML
by fmlsomuch / 02/25/2012 at 3:51pm / Japan / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 3:40am / United States (New York) / Health
Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML
by loveinanelevator / 02/13/2012 at 7:03am / Health
Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML
by great / 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm / United States / Work
Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to my dozy cat who'd managed to get into my car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work. I lost control when I was startled by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror. FML
by Anonymous / 01/18/2012 at 6:30am / Australia / Transportation
by Anonymous / 01/12/2012 at 10:50pm / United States / Love
Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML
by hannaaaahr / 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health
Today, I rode the public bus. When I got off, I put my hood up only to discover that the old man who sat behind me had used my hood as a trashcan for his gum and used Kleenex. I can't get the gum out of my hair. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 1:42am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML
by perenoel / 12/03/2011 at 11:24am / France / Kids
- Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, I’m in Rome for Halloween. I went out with few friends and spent the night with a man. The… Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without…