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GoingCommando93's FML badges
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GoingCommando93's favorite FMLs
by awesome / 01/05/2012 at 12:13pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
by Anonymous / 12/29/2011 at 10:07pm / China / Miscellaneous
Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML
by Katrin / 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm / Norway / Transportation
by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 10:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML
by SonOfaSpy / 07/17/2011 at 9:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/02/2009 at 9:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, I had a job interview at a local business with the owner who was man, and the manager who was a woman. I thought I did pretty well because I heard the manager whisper so, as I was walking out. Then I heard the owner whisper "no fat chicks." FML
by Anonymous / 05/15/2009 at 7:00am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
by anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 10:17am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by mocass’1 / 10/13/2008 at 4:19am / France / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…