Gloritank

Search for a member

Gloritank

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 February 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2215
  • Number of comments : 166
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Gloritank's page activity

Visits<b>MoodyJ</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:25am<b>itsalanis</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:37am<b>Addiction333</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 11:41am<b>colinabi</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 5:40pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:06pm<b>Fennex3</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 6:48pm<b>Lanker</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 8:39am<b>fobgirl10171</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:11am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:11pm<b>justinccp</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 10:49pm<b>Fidge86</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:52am<b>o_oBriBrio_o</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 1:30pm<b>TinyAsianMan</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 10:40am<b>Naleldan</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 3:12pm<b>georgemac</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 3:44am<b>knt_rocks</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 5:00am<b>missalice0306</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 2:48pm<b>MichiSixx</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 1:51am

Fucked!<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 11:06pm

Gloritank's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Gloritank's badges

Gloritank's favorite FMLs

Today, while housesitting my neighbor's dogs the phone rang. I answered it and a voice said, "Stop checking your Facebook and take care of my dogs. They look like they need to go out." FML

by Bobby / 08/10/2012 at 7:42am / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

by oops / 07/15/2012 at 1:34am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

by jaderie / 04/21/2012 at 5:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a note from my parents saying we need to talk. Assuming it was about the weed I'd left on my dresser, I quickly confessed. Turns out my dog died. FML

by marymark / 04/12/2012 at 9:02pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my boss if I could have a bigger cubicle. I'm now working in one that is half the size of my old one. FML

by hatemyboss / 04/12/2012 at 8:37pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I saw an article about how some people think internet access is more important than sex. I asked my boyfriend which he thought was more important. He chose internet access. FML

by justwow / 03/21/2012 at 7:58pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML

by bad karma / 11/21/2011 at 9:34am / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML

by joser6969 / 10/29/2011 at 10:07am / United States / Work

Today, my dad yelled for me. It was an emergency. I ran down the stairs, tripped, fell, and limped over to my dad only to find that he wanted me to see a video of someone playing "Bohemian Rhapsody" on the ukulele. FML

by camille / 10/29/2011 at 9:40am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

by ifeeldirty / 10/27/2011 at 8:22am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I had to climb up and sit in a tree for half an hour to avoid being mauled by a huge, insane dog. Its weird-looking owner eventually turned up, sneered at me, and walked off with the visibly smug dog in tow. FML

by Doglover / 10/13/2011 at 11:55am / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Animals

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids