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GingerM101's FML badges
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GingerM101's favorite FMLs
Today, I found an injured rabbit by the side of the road. I was about to take it to the local vet, when my husband picked it up and casually snapped its neck. "No rabbit's worth my money" he said, forgetting that he's been a jobless moocher for over 3 years. Pass me the goddamn divorce papers. FML
by Anonymous / 05/14/2016 at 6:34am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, my father informed me that I will have no chance of dating a good man if I keep up with these interracial relationships. And that he won't be supporting me through college if I continue this "rebellion." My boyfriend is half black and loves the same music, sports, and movies as my dad. FML
by katiebird / 03/16/2016 at 4:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by wellthisisbad / 02/29/2016 at 7:27am / United States (Florida) / Kids
by Anonymous / 12/17/2015 at 8:59pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/13/2015 at 7:45am / Transportation
by strictly cum prancing / 12/11/2015 at 2:48pm / United States / Love
by Thank God I Flush Them Down The Toilet / 09/25/2015 at 9:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, after carefully, and might I say, expertly removing all the hair from my girlfriend's genitals, she decided to try and "Nair" my balls. 24 hours later and I still can't walk properly and my balls look like they were involved in a severe kitchen incident. FML
by davetherave1983 / 09/09/2015 at 1:09am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Health
Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML
by BarhydtBran / 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous
Today, while driving to my daughter's wedding, the person behind us kept laying on her horn and yelling every time I stopped for a red light. That person was my wife. Sadly I'm too whipped to stand up to her and spent the whole drive pretending not to hear my passengers snickering at me. FML
by Anonymous / 11/15/2014 at 10:23am / Australia (Queensland) / Transportation
Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML
by Anonymous / 11/08/2014 at 12:24pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by 4evalone / 11/01/2014 at 1:59am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML
by anonymous / 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
by thealaskanyoung / 10/29/2014 at 11:58pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've… Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She gave me back the brand new box of 12 condoms that I had… Today, my fiancé had to perform his first prostate exam. He told me he was quite nervous about it,…