About Geekyandproud : Define yourself by the best that is in you, not by the worst that has been done to you.
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Geekyandproud's favorite FMLs
Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML
by anonymous / 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, while reading 1984 on the train, a cute guy around my age and I got into a great a discussion about the book. Just when I thought he might ask for my number, he got up, patted me on the head and said it's so nice that kids my age still took interest in real literature. I'm 25. FML
by anonymous / 10/24/2014 at 9:47am / Austria (Wien) / Transportation
Today, as always, I have Tourette's syndrome. It causes me to occasionally make a beeping noise. My boyfriend just figured out that if he beeps back, it makes me beep again. He thinks it's hilarious and won't stop. FML
by Beeper / 10/11/2014 at 3:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML
by mykodu / 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by anon / 09/25/2014 at 1:48am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/14/2014 at 12:38am / France / Animals
Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML
by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm / Spain (Comunidad Valenciana) / Animals
by stopinthenameoflove / 06/19/2014 at 10:37am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/17/2014 at 8:26am / United Kingdom / Health
Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML
by Anonymous / 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm / Singapore / Intimacy
Today, my boss yet again said she was "literally dying", after she watched a funny video online. Long story short, I'm now on her shitlist because I couldn't help but point out that she clearly wasn't dying, and that her ranting was distracting me from doing actual work. FML
by Anonymous / 05/17/2014 at 12:02pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by Anonymous / 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals
by thanks4support / 05/14/2014 at 9:12am / United States (Ohio) / Health
by Sue Ellen / 04/21/2014 at 11:43am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy
Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML
by fuckmeitsgettingworse / 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my phone provider informed me that I had 12 messages waiting for me on my voicemail. Happy… Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me yesterday: I said that I loved unusual…