Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

GayBlowjob

Search for a member

GayBlowjob

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7484
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About GayBlowjob : I'm Ereik.

If you want to get to know me any more, and it really means that much to you, you can message me. Otherwise, don't expect much out of me.

♡Flowers will wither away, but a bomb-ass booty is forever.♡

look at my shitty shit at sadusa.tumblr.com & @h20_d on insta

GayBlowjob's page activity

Visits<b>hatchworth</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 8:54pm<b>Muddiggergirl</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 10:38pm<b>EverestMelting</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 5:58pm<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 8:00pm<b>Agafue</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:57pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:33pm<b>wdthompson1</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:24am<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 1:28am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 1:12am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 3:40am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 1:27pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:49pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:28pm<b>ChloeMiller18</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 1:57am<b>datuglykorean</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 8:22pm<b>CrystalCrew124</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 5:03pm<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 9:11pm<b>Patty410</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 4:25pm

GayBlowjob's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of GayBlowjob's badges

GayBlowjob's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML

#20480667
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31683) - you deserved it (17470)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:38am - misc - by LucidNightmare - United States (Colorado)

Today, I heard an owl near my house. I got excited, as they are not common in the area, and I listened intently to try and locate the source of the sound. After a few minutes, I realized I was not listening to an owl, but to my mother's sex noises. FML

#20480168
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45810) - you deserved it (4748)

On 01/26/2013 at 6:50pm - intimacy - by movingout - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML

#20478275
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35109) - you deserved it (5949)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML

#20478247
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35235) - you deserved it (3855)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML

#20477083
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28402) - you deserved it (3525)

On 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by oh ffs (man) - United States

Today, I took an IQ test and ended up scoring above average. Feeling good about myself, I decided to bake some cookies. After 30 minutes of them not doing anything in the oven, I realized I forgot to turn the oven on. FML

#20475894
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16707) - you deserved it (29925)

On 01/24/2013 at 12:16am - misc - by steven - United States (California)

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

#20472081
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42090) - you deserved it (4291)

On 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by sarah6786 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

#20470936
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46611) - you deserved it (3976)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML

#20470654
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20521) - you deserved it (41062)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:32am - love - by black and yellow - United States (California)

Today, my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven, a dryer, a dishwasher, a toilet, and a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML

#20470154
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31675) - you deserved it (3241)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

#20465889
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60400) - you deserved it (6949)

On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mom wished me "Happy Conception Day." FML

#20462817
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25897) - you deserved it (4013)

On 01/16/2013 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML

#20462590
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40459) - you deserved it (3407)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

#20461046
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43623) - you deserved it (7187)

On 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm - intimacy - by itsrathersmall (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42825) - you deserved it (7371)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: