GOLD3NxWARRIOR

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GOLD3NxWARRIOR

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 19424
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About GOLD3NxWARRIOR : Life will knock you down, but it's not about whether you get up- it's about the experience that you have learned from it.

GOLD3NxWARRIOR's page activity

Visits<b>islandkid3</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 3:06pm<b>mlc4664</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:34pm<b>tiny1972</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:50pm<b>HighasaCloud</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:28am<b>Lunab123</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:10am<b>drayloon</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 12:21am<b>German_97</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 6:20pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 10:37am<b>VeganDarkLight</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 3:53am<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:11am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 8:48pm<b>fistingeggplant</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:05am<b>mmmmKatie</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 10:53pm<b>colby6666</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 10:49pm<b>OnePLAN</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:52pm<b>camimarvez1</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 11:53am<b>savygirl367</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 8:43pm<b>rabidunicorn</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:51am

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GOLD3NxWARRIOR's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML

by Natsert99 / 12/08/2016 at 9:02am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving my boyfriend oral sex when he pulled away without warning. As I looked up at him to see what was wrong, he screamed "JUSTICE RAINS FROM ABOVE!" and shot his load in my eyes. FML

by Junkrat / 12/08/2016 at 8:32am / Intimacy

Today, I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. His 3-year-old nephew came running for a hug. At the last second, he darted past my arms and bit me on the ass. FML

by buttpain / 12/01/2016 at 1:29pm / Kids

Today, the 8 year old that I babysit every week told me that it was sad that I didn't have a boyfriend while he has a girlfriend. I got burned by a 3rd grader. FML

by Babysitter Probs / 11/27/2016 at 12:58am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I found out that sometimes when my girlfriend is mad at me she will allow our unfixed male dog to jack off on my pillows when I'm at work. She won the battle and the war. FML

by NotTHATbad / 11/19/2016 at 12:26pm / Intimacy

Today, at school, we were supposed to say something that we are thankful for. When I was about to speak, one of the girls at my table said, "It's okay, you can say PornHub." FML

by Bonngoo / 11/17/2016 at 1:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to make things less awkward by complimenting my Tai Chi partner's ring and he says, "Thanks, it's a purity ring!" I said, "I used to have one of those. Would you believe me if I said I lost it in a river?" Now my entire Tai Chi class thinks I lost my virginity in a river. FML

by Lizzy / 11/10/2016 at 10:01pm / Intimacy

Today, I finally lost my virginity. I also found out the side effects of my antidepressants: It's hard for me to get it up, and I can't orgasm. When I finally got it up, I went so long, it ended with her saying, "Yeah, you should stop now, I'm numb." FML

by Nightshade823 / 11/10/2016 at 2:12pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, after having surgery and told not to have sex for two weeks, I've been begging my boyfriend to allow me to give him a blowjob, trying to be nice. He doesn't want to because he can't reciprocate. Not only has not having sex drove me insane, so is not being able to touch my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2016 at 2:25am / United States / Intimacy

Today, without thinking, I casually advised my mum that the best way to get the piping nozzle clean is to 'fingerfuck' it. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2016 at 4:31am / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend whilst straddled on top of him. He started to undo my bra. I was fine with this but he stopped kissing me and looked at me with a slight smile. He then said, "I know this is going to kill the mood... but I feel like I could milk your boobs right now" FML

by cheekymonkey97 / 10/24/2016 at 12:48pm / Intimacy

Today, while commuting to work on a peak hour train, I lost my balance and accidentally grabbed a bald mans head to steady myself. To make matters worse, the words "oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I thought you were a knob" came out of my mouth before I could think about what I was saying. FML

by ShameMonkey / 09/27/2016 at 6:15am / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation

Today, my dog brought me his squeaky toy to throw for him. I went to throw it down the hallway but it hit the door and bounced about a foot in front of him. He just stared at me for a minute like I was dumb, then took it to my boyfriend to throw. I disappoint even my dog. FML

by nattnatt73 / 09/10/2016 at 3:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I discovered that in the three days I left my 18-year-old son in charge, my dog had gotten pregnant. When I confronted my son about it, he stated, "I don't want the reputation of being a cock-blocker." FML

by anonymous / 09/04/2016 at 6:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, as I was crossing a street, a car hit me and broke two of my ribs. The driver was too busy paying attention to his girlfriend who was giving him a blowjob from the passenger seat. I could see the look of ecstasy on his face as he rammed into me and drove off without noticing. FML

by Sean / 08/14/2016 at 12:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation