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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 November 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 44
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Future_Olympian : I swim all day every day

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Future_Olympian's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML


I agree, your life sucks (66262) - you deserved it (14884)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML


I agree, your life sucks (73255) - you deserved it (11215)

On 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41221) - you deserved it (5746)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:55am - intimacy - by jealouspussy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45523) - you deserved it (8624)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I went swimming with this guy I like at dammed river. While we were jumping off the dam, I decided to try to impress him by doing a front flip. I didn't jump far enough off, so when I went to flip, my face skidded down the concrete wall. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33227) - you deserved it (42881)

On 07/04/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

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