About Fsvb : Look at that fat birdie up there. Look at it. Isn't it awesome? Her name is Derp :)
Fsvb's FML badges
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Fsvb's favorite FMLs
by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work
Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML
by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
by Wmsys32pr9 / 03/30/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by mehdi / 10/13/2008 at 4:20am / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was playing video games when my balls felt itchy. I had been sick for the past few days so… Today, I spent two hours in the rain at a concert waiting for my favorite band to come on. The show… Today, my parents told me not to wear headphones while mowing the lawn, because the sound was too…