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Flyersfan54

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Flyersfan54
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 January 1994 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 388
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Flyersfan54 : All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity.

LET'S GO FLYERS!!

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Flyersfan54's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML

#19933924
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21772) - you deserved it (5962)

On 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was in a business meeting. I was giving a Powerpoint presentation to my boss and a few other associates. Then a notification popped up in the middle of my presentation reminding me that I needed to renew my pornhub subscription. FML

#19754220
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10206) - you deserved it (32031)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:58am - work - by WaffleMan (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, in a drunken state, I decided that it would be a good idea to shave with a pizza cutter. FML

#19748828
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4365) - you deserved it (21437)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:10am - health - by Darwin_Award_Winner (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

#19716339
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27374) - you deserved it (2319)

On 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7861) - you deserved it (29330)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, trying to look cool, I threw my coke bottle in the air, and tried to catch it with one hand. I missed and it fell to the floor. Luckily, it wasn't open, but in my unimaginable stupidity, I opened it less than five seconds later. FML

#19678875
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4661) - you deserved it (31580)

On 05/25/2012 at 3:30pm - misc - by stupidity (woman) - Switzerland (Geneve)

Today, trying to look cool, I threw my coke bottle in the air, and tried to catch it with one hand. I missed and it fell to the floor. Luckily, it wasn't open, but in my unimaginable stupidity, I opened it less than five seconds later. FML

#19678875
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4661) - you deserved it (31580)

On 05/25/2012 at 3:30pm - misc - by stupidity (woman) - Switzerland (Geneve)

Today, I got fired from my job at a weight-loss center because I was too skinny, and apparently it's too depressing for the customers to handle. FML

#19677400
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18815) - you deserved it (2333)

On 05/25/2012 at 7:18am - work - by jingle - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was choosing my soft drink at a restaurant. The kid in front of me was too short to reach the lids so I handed him one. His mom rushed over, pried it out of his hands, threw it away, and yelled, "She's filthy, don't use that." FML

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

#19401228
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20791) - you deserved it (3880)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by jackmehoffa (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML

#19332280
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29693) - you deserved it (4548)

On 03/23/2012 at 11:34am - kids - by Confused (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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