FlapDragon

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Offline (the 09/06/2015 at 9:20am)

FlapDragon

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 November 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7444
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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FlapDragon's page activity

Visits<b>kdittmar098</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 11:01am<b>Rkikkas9713</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 1:02pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 4:18pm<b>lima_papa60</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 3:54pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 11:43am<b>njgohard</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 12:51am<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 9:43pm<b>callmefunnymam</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 1:04am<b>MyUsernameIsBest</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 12:12am<b>redwill85</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 9:59am<b>agent4442</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 10:31pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 7:55pm<b>mpkpm</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Minedibuzz</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 7:08pm<b>markal2231</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 3:15am<b>yginez</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 4:53pm<b>AMN1D</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 4:25pm<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 6:52am

Fucked!<b>lima_papa60</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 9:54pm

FlapDragon's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of FlapDragon's badges

FlapDragon's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend has been sulking like a moody kid all day, all because I won't set my phone background to a picture of his dick. FML

by natalyV / 09/04/2015 at 11:58am / Intimacy

Today, while making out in my car, the guy I was with decided it'd be a great idea to stick his tongue in my ear. He shoved it in so far that my ear still feels wet four hours later. FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2015 at 9:30pm / Intimacy

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

by notwhatithought / 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML

by ppema / 07/31/2015 at 2:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be hilarious to secretly swap her and my mom's numbers in my phone, then sexually tease me before going to work. I found out about the prank when I texted my "girlfriend", saying I was going to fuck her so hard she wouldn't walk straight for days. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2015 at 12:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2015 at 4:51pm / United States / Kids

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2015 at 1:01am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids

Today, I heard my 2-year-old sister crying, so I left my room to comfort her. She looked at me, held my hand, escorted me back to my room and closed the door. FML

by transcendingnerd / 04/13/2015 at 6:46am / Philippines (Manila) / Kids

Today, I managed to get my 4-year-old son to agree that, "cigarettes are poop." I was a lot less proud of myself when he pointed at a 6-foot bodybuilder-type dude in the subway and yelled, "That man smells of pooooooop." FML

by Insanity / 04/09/2015 at 1:28am / France (Centre) / Kids

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

by Anonymous / 03/30/2015 at 6:30am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my 2-year-old brother is afraid of his own penis. Whenever he doesn't have a diaper on, he screams, cries and yells, "Ew". FML

by okseñoryoucrazy / 02/01/2015 at 7:43pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I witnessed a man masturbate into a public urinal, miss, fart, and then leave without washing his hands. FML

by grossedout / 02/01/2015 at 6:10pm / United States (Virginia) / Health