Fiori4

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Offline (the 02/05/2015 at 7:56pm)

Fiori4

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3152
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Fiori4's page activity

Visits<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 6:57pm<b>binger_gitch</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 11:52pm<b>swick25</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 2:44pm<b>ileenefudge</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 3:50pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 7:20am<b>jsteele64</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 3:39am<b>USMC_Guy0313</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 2:36am<b>atalanta18</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 9:10pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 6:02am<b>SininenAave</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 11:51pm<b>kykyrose</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 10:30pm<b>grizzlybear26</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 5:05pm<b>scottmn2740</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 9:43am<b>shellykjelly</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 12:02pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 8:15am<b>BrianMcF</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 10:44pm<b>tompou6</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:41pm<b>Thiaskia</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 11:24pm

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Fiori4's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2014 at 7:34am / United States / Kids

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

by sabz21 / 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I found my little brother breathing heavily and asked him what he was doing. He looked at me intensely and said "Breathing in all the oxygen so you can't have any and die." 5ML

by SirDirtyRedD / 01/24/2014 at 8:03pm / Iceland (Gullbringusysla) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

by sickmom / 01/21/2014 at 6:07am / United States (Louisiana) / Kids

Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML

by Ginger_Gawd / 01/20/2014 at 10:34pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

by anon / 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I used the restroom at a mall. I thought I was alone, so I started singing. When I got out of the stall, there were men staring at me. Not only did I embarrass myself with my own singing, I'd accidentally used the men's restroom too. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2014 at 7:26pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

by rollergirl13 / 01/11/2014 at 12:55am / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

by lukas / 01/10/2014 at 7:24pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I joked with a pregnant girl in a state juvenile correctional facility where I work that eating a lot of candy would damage the unborn baby's teeth. Without batting an eye, she responded that she would simply "eat some toothpaste after the candy." FML

by polluxdc / 01/10/2014 at 3:20am / United States (Oregon) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, nothing said Christmas quite like my dad taking 18 shots of vodka, falling on the Christmas tree while holding our 3-year-old cousin and denying it ever happened when he woke up later. FML

by thanks_world / 12/26/2013 at 1:48am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous