Fiori4

Search for a member

Offline (the 02/05/2015 at 7:56pm)

Fiori4

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3034
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Fiori4 : Want to know? Ask.

Fiori4's page activity

Visits<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 6:57pm<b>binger_gitch</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 11:52pm<b>swick25</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 2:44pm<b>ileenefudge</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 3:50pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 7:20am<b>jsteele64</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 3:39am<b>USMC_Guy0313</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 2:36am<b>atalanta18</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 9:10pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 6:02am<b>SininenAave</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 11:51pm<b>kykyrose</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 10:30pm<b>grizzlybear26</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 5:05pm<b>scottmn2740</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 9:43am<b>shellykjelly</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 12:02pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 8:15am<b>BrianMcF</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 10:44pm<b>tompou6</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:41pm<b>Thiaskia</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 11:24pm

Fiori4's FML badges

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of Fiori4's badges

Fiori4's favorite FMLs

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

by doodler / 02/27/2014 at 6:59am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML

by HelpMe / 02/25/2014 at 4:59am / United Kingdom (Scottish Borders, The) / Animals

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

by hot sweet.... not / 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Kids

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

by awkward / 02/22/2014 at 12:39am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

by Charlie529 / 02/19/2014 at 10:30am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

by molliciousj / 02/19/2014 at 12:09am / United States (Texas) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm / United States / Love

Today, I discovered that when one of my toddlers throws up, the other sympathy-pukes too, and that this continues until they're both empty. I guess my car is going to stink of vomit for a while. FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2014 at 2:10pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Kids

Today, I was waiting in line at a clothes store when someone cut in in front of me, and the gentlemen in front of me. I shouted, "Hey! Queue starts back here!". He responded by pointing out the "gentlemen" in front was actually a very realistic mannequin. FML

by QueueJumper / 02/10/2014 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

by took it / 02/09/2014 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

by so scared / 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2014 at 8:03pm / United States (New York) / Health