FinJage

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Offline (the 03/24/2016 at 10:02pm)

FinJage

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11380
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FinJage : | Say goodnight to the Voices in your head |
| You never heard them anyway |
| You just might be insane |

FinJage's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:03am<b>Katdurin</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 6:38pm<b>VHNox</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 8:01pm<b>Misfitsfitin</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 1:18am<b>hodoring</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:07pm<b>valerie_273</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 8:30pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:55pm<b>emotionalhentai</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:32pm<b>TheRealCT</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 7:08pm<b>grilakuddy</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 2:57am<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 10:03pm<b>petrolhead</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 9:56am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 11:31am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:58pm<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:52pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 7:59pm<b>axeno</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 2:37am<b>ArielTheMermaid</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:02pm

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FinJage's favorite FMLs

Today, whilst getting out of the shower, I tripped on the lip of the siding, bruising my middle toe. I fell, and in doing so, squished my cat. She won't even make eye contact and keeps wheezing. I have a feeling she is plotting my death. FML

Today, a robin flew into my window and died. My mom, being a biology teacher, thought it would be a great experience for my brother and me to dissect it on the kitchen table. She threatened to ground us if we didn't do it. FML

by sciencesadness / 02/08/2014 at 6:24pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, wanting to break up with my boyfriend, I invited him to dinner with my parents. I was sure they'd hate him, which would give me the excuse I needed. They ended up loving him, and now they won't stop mentioning marriage. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2014 at 6:16pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

by anonymous / 02/04/2014 at 9:48pm / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear. I thought it was a sweet thing to do, until I saw him open a slit in its back while visiting later in the day and removing a bag of weed. He gave me a teddy bear just so he could smuggle drugs past my parents. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2014 at 4:29pm / United Kingdom (Suffolk) / Love

Today, I found my little brother breathing heavily and asked him what he was doing. He looked at me intensely and said "Breathing in all the oxygen so you can't have any and die." 5ML

by SirDirtyRedD / 01/24/2014 at 8:03pm / Iceland (Gullbringusysla) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

by Kaddiscott / 01/20/2014 at 5:12am / Italy (Trentino-Alto Adige) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm / Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional) / Animals

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend saw a YouTube video of a guy throwing boiling water into the cold air, with the water immediately turning to ice and vapor. He copied it, but only succeeded in dousing himself with boiling water, then making me drive his idiot self to the hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 11:12am / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to a figure holding a knife above me. After I screamed in terror, the figure burst into laughter. It was my mom. She did this as payback for me not washing the dishes last night after making food. FML

by awkwardpartybear / 01/04/2014 at 6:43pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

by beemove / 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, a DJ friend of mine offered me a part in one of his tracks. I was flattered, and accepted. All I ended up singing was, "I'm a bitch, I'm a bitch" over and over again in the background. FML

by Cacahuete / 12/28/2013 at 9:46am / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Kids

Today, my psychotic grandma set fire to our Christmas tree because she refuses to let us celebrate what she calls a twisted pagan holiday. FML

by take a fucking seat, gran / 12/14/2013 at 5:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous