Fidge86

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Offline (the 04/29/2015 at 5:01am)

Fidge86

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 30 December 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8985
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Fidge86's page activity

Visits<b>Austinh8850</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 8:58pm<b>CharlieM78</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 11:28am<b>xXxGraveStonexXx</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:28am<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 1:40pm<b>xSLEEPYxHEADx</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 3:07am<b>T_Young96</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 12:38pm<b>KAT0INFINITY</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 9:49am<b>CraZedMadMan</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:31pm<b>samuelee</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 6:58pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:47am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 5:46pm<b>SweetasCandy0609</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 5:00pm<b>NWO666</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 3:24am<b>bigboi1992</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 5:01am<b>TheDoctor10</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 6:00pm<b>boomboom838</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 3:41pm<b>Catuser</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 6:52pm

Fidge86's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Fidge86's badges

Fidge86's favorite FMLs

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he triumphantly flung the condom to the ceiling, only to have it come down and smack me in the face. FML

by omgdesdes / 11/15/2014 at 8:29pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

by jennabee97 / 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I took a army-mandated personality evaluation test. The results said I had a high chance of schizophrenia and multiple personality syndrome. Part of me says that the test is probably spot-on, the other part says it has to be a mistake. Apparently this is another sign of schizophrenia. FML

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

by jay-frey96 / 11/02/2014 at 10:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I got drug tested for the second time this week. It's Tuesday. FML

by yus / 10/21/2014 at 3:46pm / United States (California) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I was a test tube baby. He looked at me with confusion before asking, "But if scientists made you, surely you'd be really attractive and talented and stuff?" FML

by thanks babe / 10/06/2014 at 7:47pm / United Kingdom (Shropshire) / Love

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

by SadMother / 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2014 at 11:30am / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

by oops / 08/22/2014 at 10:35am / Australia (Western Australia) / Health

Today, I got drunk, broke up with my girlfriend, and sent my grandma nude pics, thinking she was my girlfriend. Well, ex-girlfriend. FML

by Kev / 08/20/2014 at 1:53pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I excitedly told my family that, after years of studying and dedication, I've been awarded a full scholarship to Germany. My mom's reaction was to start sobbing about me becoming a "heathen" and my dad and brother started telling Nazi jokes. FML

by UnSupported / 08/14/2014 at 11:28am / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her". The conversation ended with me getting hung up on because I "don't have a heart". FML

by pocketrocket90 / 08/08/2014 at 2:05am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy