Falassalond

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Offline (the 11/25/2016 at 4:25am)

Falassalond

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 October 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8225
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Falassalond : Hi! I've been on FML for a long time. I read comments a lot. The best part of FML is the comments. Most of you have probably made me laugh. So thanks. Have a nice day!

Falassalond's page activity

Visits<b>AWildFresh</b> - 5 hours ago<b>jumpin4frogz</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 10:26pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 10:16pm<b>J_macias15</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 1:20am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 9:14pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 10:20pm<b>hox83</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:18pm<b>cheeeksss</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 9:05am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 3:11am<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:00pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 3:25pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 9:22am<b>swanheart</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 2:29am<b>Stripes12345</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 9:47pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 2:12pm<b>Araj_Hs</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 5:27am<b>Princess_Ash12</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 4:59pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 1:11pm

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 4:16am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 2:40am<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 2:22pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 7:35pm<b>Princess_Ash12</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 10:59pm

Falassalond's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Falassalond's badges

Falassalond's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother-in-law yelled from across the house for me to come quickly. She sounded frantic, so I rushed and asked what was wrong. She said, "Nothing." and that she just wanted to remind me that she hates my guts. She'll be living here with me and my wife for the next two months. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 5:30pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 5:34pm / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Health

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

by YouSoSmelly / 08/02/2013 at 9:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Kids

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my family and I went to feed carrots to the giraffes at the zoo. After I finished my first cup of carrots, I turned back to get some more. Suddenly, I was jerked back and a chunk of my hair was ripped out. The giraffe mistook the orange barrette in my hair for a carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 4:19am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

by confusedmofo / 07/29/2013 at 2:35am / Indonesia / Love

Today, the great deal on my new apartment has turned into a nightmare. I keep hearing extremely weird sounds almost every night, and when I tried taking pics of the place today, my camera's face recognition feature kept activating, but only in my bedroom. I'm scared shitless. FML

by notenoughunderwearintheworld / 07/21/2013 at 4:54pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Transportation

Today, my dentist dropped dead of a heart attack. This depressing event was made worse by the fact that he collapsed while his hands were in my mouth. FML

by Kat_Styles / 07/19/2013 at 4:51am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went on a blind date and we seemed to have hit it off nicely. I asked him if he could drive me home. Along the way he stopped on a pitch-black road and told me to get out so he could take a picture. He then gave me my bag and drove off, leaving me stranded in the middle of nowhere. FML

by Misshhh / 07/19/2013 at 12:02am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, after asking my psychiatrist about natural alternatives to medication for my depression, she replied, "Why not Zoidberg?" FML

by thanksdoc / 06/24/2013 at 6:12pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy