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Falassalond

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Falassalond
  • Town/Country : NY, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 October 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1631
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Falassalond : Hi! I've been on FML for a long time. I read comments a lot. The best part of FML is the comments. Most of you have probably made me laugh. So thanks. Have a nice day!

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Falassalond's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13306) - you deserved it (37028)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37669) - you deserved it (2853)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

#18358033
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61046) - you deserved it (2880)

On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27098) - you deserved it (14179)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friends and I were going to do an ugly sweater photo shoot. When we met up, one of them was wearing a sweater I gave on her birthday. FML

#18346982
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23435) - you deserved it (9158)

On 11/25/2011 at 1:08pm - misc - by ravlol - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

#18345679
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10931) - you deserved it (54092)

On 11/25/2011 at 10:02am - intimacy - by Dickhead - Lebanon

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

#18338481
489 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42607) - you deserved it (4022)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by haunted (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML

#18283192
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36968) - you deserved it (5476)

On 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got a letter of complaint from my landlord. It said my loud, obnoxious trampling is disturbing my downstairs neighbor, and I have to stop. I'm small and hardly weigh anything, but it seems that if I want to keep my lease, I'll have to master the art of levitating. FML

#18281989
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23043) - you deserved it (2530)

On 11/18/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24039) - you deserved it (7451)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was reading a book in German, which I don't know very well. Suddenly I reached a passage I had no trouble understanding. Excited, I showed my husband, saying I was finally getting the hang of it. He laughed and patted my head. Turns out, that particular passage was a quote. In English. FML

#18266824
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8385) - you deserved it (31086)

On 11/16/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by dunicha - United States (Texas)

Today, the handle in the port-a-potty broke off, with me inside. FML

#18230323
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24270) - you deserved it (2231)

On 11/12/2011 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, only after I almost knocked myself out cold with the shampoo bottle, did I finally get some out. FML

#18229503
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13459) - you deserved it (3879)

On 11/12/2011 at 4:13pm - health - by Courtney (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was following my friend to her house in my car, because I didn't know where it was. I'd been following her for at least an hour when she pulled into a gas station. Turns out I'd been following the wrong car. I have no idea where I am. FML

#18225132
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25780) - you deserved it (9064)

On 11/12/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by friedchicken - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad was putting seasoning salt into his mashed potatoes, when the lid came off and poured a ton of salt into the pot. My parents hate wasting food, so we still had to eat it. I think my taste buds are broken. FML



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