Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Falassalond

Offline (yesterday at 8:04pm) | Search for a member

Falassalond

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 October 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5602
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Falassalond : Hi! I've been on FML for a long time. I read comments a lot. The best part of FML is the comments. Most of you have probably made me laugh. So thanks. Have a nice day!

Falassalond's page activity

Visits<b>Exaspera</b> - yesterday at 3:11am<b>hox83</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 3:11pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:00pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 3:25pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 9:22am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 2:35pm<b>swanheart</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 2:29am<b>Stripes12345</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 9:47pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 2:12pm<b>Araj_Hs</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 5:27am<b>Princess_Ash12</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 4:59pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 1:11pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:45pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:17am<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:14am<b>AnOriginalName</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 2:29am<b>kingdutchhy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 1:24am<b>plateface1998</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:29pm

Fucked!<b>Exaspera</b> - yesterday at 2:40am<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 2:22pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 7:35pm<b>Princess_Ash12</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 10:59pm

Falassalond's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Falassalond's badges

Falassalond's favorite FMLs

Today, I felt bad about rarely complimenting my mom about her cooking, so during dinner, I raved about her incredible, creamy, macaroni and cheese. It came from a box. FML

#21312880
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26396) - you deserved it (7024)

On 12/06/2014 at 11:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I still didn't feel quite awake after the first lesson at school, so I went to get a cup of coffee from the vending machine. I had just enough money for it. No cup dropped into the holder, and the whole thing poured straight into the drip tray while I watched. FML

#21310620
84 comments

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

#21310320
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28596) - you deserved it (5102)

On 12/02/2014 at 7:56pm - animals - by allykat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48190) - you deserved it (13529)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28554) - you deserved it (3273)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, my five year old sister won't stop saying, "shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML

#21303585
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26851) - you deserved it (2943)

On 11/21/2014 at 10:29pm - kids - by angkal2002 - Australia

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

#21303024
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32144) - you deserved it (15154)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44160) - you deserved it (3858)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

#21292789
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28990) - you deserved it (3332)

On 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by aineroo (woman) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML

#21286814
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31643) - you deserved it (4984)

On 10/28/2014 at 3:40am - animals - by thewrittenrebel - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my brother got upset at his video game and flung his DS at the wall, just as I was walking by. I got knocked out to the sound of someone crossing the finish line in MarioKart. FML

#21285323
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (2524)

On 10/25/2014 at 11:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, as a limo driver, I had to drive 8 guys for a night-out from their wives. I put the Michigan/Rutgers game on the radio, thinking they would appreciate that. Apparently, they wanted to listen to their "pump-up" songs instead, which were mostly Katy Perry songs. FML

#21271972
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37510) - you deserved it (4800)

On 10/06/2014 at 11:05am - work - by theseguysarewhipped... - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42757) - you deserved it (5154)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a customer was looking for some decking materials. I took her around the store and pointed out some nice plywood, noting that it's also fire-retardant, which might interest her. She got pissed off and bitched me out for supposedly calling her a retard. FML

#21270214
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31623) - you deserved it (2629)

On 10/03/2014 at 5:13pm - work - by hopeless (man) - Canada



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2 : School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: