Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 August 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2094
  • Number of comments : 283
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 3 posted

About FMLshark : Hi, I'm FMLshark. I am a rare species of shark that dwells in the seas of FML. My diet consists of spelling and grammar-challenged idiots, as well as a variety of people who feel the need to say things like "Doesn't matter, had sex", thinking it's funny.
"Today, I posted a link up on reddit.... it didn't get up voted :( FML"

FMLshark's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 11:54am<b>XXFMLXXQUEENXX</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:04am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 10:43am<b>VonTritonIV</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 2:33am<b>mikuxxhatsune</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 10:20pm<b>SarkasticGenius</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 12:20pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 10:31am<b>3051628</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 6:28pm<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 9:55am<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 5:44pm<b>EpicKassi</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 12:52am<b>BeatleManiac1960</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 1:53pm<b>Seabass_Chan</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 11:05pm<b>emmacrossan825</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 10:54pm<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 10:58pm<b>_kristaaxo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 12:40am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 9:28am<b>mcronin</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 10:59pm

Fucked!<b>XXFMLXXQUEENXX</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:04pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 3:31pm<b>3051628</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 11:28pm<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 2:55pm<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 10:44pm<b>EpicKassi</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 6:52am<b>BeatleManiac1960</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 7:53pm<b>Seabass_Chan</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 5:05am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 4:58am<b>MeowMcMeowenson</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:13am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 3:28pm<b>ChrysN</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 4:22pm<b>unkn0wnx25</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 3:13am<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 8:19pm<b>Spentpoet</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 5:21am<b>sadbubbles</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 5:08am

FMLshark's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of FMLshark's badges

FMLshark's favorite FMLs

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40578) - you deserved it (1927)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32610) - you deserved it (3239)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML


I agree, your life sucks (30899) - you deserved it (3227)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14039) - you deserved it (44946)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, I admitted to my parents that I have an eating disorder. Instead of trying to help, my mom stared at me and said, "Duh". FML


I agree, your life sucks (24889) - you deserved it (4193)

On 05/28/2012 at 9:38pm - misc - by Hungrey - United States

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26930) - you deserved it (2968)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML


I agree, your life sucks (10988) - you deserved it (20465)

On 04/18/2012 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20885) - you deserved it (6210)

On 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm - work - by Simms (man) - United States

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34899) - you deserved it (3227)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29981) - you deserved it (2827)

On 01/24/2012 at 6:47am - misc - by SpongeAbii2 - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35273) - you deserved it (29576)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after my son graduated from nursing school which I, as a single parent, paid for with blood, sweat, and tears, during his grad party he was asked what his next step was. His response was, "Eh, I kinda realized I hate nursing." FML


I agree, your life sucks (38483) - you deserved it (3559)

On 10/24/2011 at 12:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML


I agree, your life sucks (52239) - you deserved it (8256)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29403) - you deserved it (3756)

On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)

Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: