FMLandurstoo

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Offline (the 04/05/2015 at 8:07am)

FMLandurstoo

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11594
  • Number of comments : 244
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About FMLandurstoo : I'm Mitchell and I'm a senior in high school and FML is one of my favorite things to do in my spare time. My favorite Family guy character is Herbert. Just to make it clear, I am straight. I miss the old days of FML with every1luvsboners and DocBastard (even though he's still here).

FMLandurstoo's page activity

Visits<b>Kidd_Ant</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:13pm<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 10:53pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 8:27am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:27pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 10:19am<b>koalasforlyfe</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 11:20pm<b>_MintyFresh</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 8:36pm<b>CREA</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:24am<b>fxreveryoung</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 3:01am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 6:50am<b>user716</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 11:12am<b>Loyalteez</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 7:37pm<b>WP40</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 4:50pm<b>shay_serendipity</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 4:50pm<b>a_w7</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:28am<b>alex47625</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 10:32am<b>marcusterry</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 9:33am<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 6:13am

Fucked!<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:53am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:28pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 5:17am<b>Smennant</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 6:45pm<b>cj89898</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 2:26am

FMLandurstoo's FML badges

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Socialite

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FMLandurstoo's favorite FMLs

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

by Rob / 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise. I stood up, took a moment to soak up some sunlight, and then spent the next hour too scared to go make my morning coffee, after my mother loudly moaned, "Ah yeah, give it to me, Woody!" from down the hall. FML

by huh / 06/02/2012 at 4:31pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm / Greece (Attiki) / Intimacy

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

by Danny / 05/28/2012 at 2:02pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Intimacy

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

by namenlos / 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

by namenlos / 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take Viagra. FML

by aaah. / 05/24/2012 at 1:42am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML

by bronco_lover89 / 05/21/2012 at 9:05pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé and I planned a romantic movie night. Champagne, popcorn, romantic comedy. Then his friend decided to show up and they've been talking about 1st generation Pokémon ever since. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2012 at 7:14pm / United States / Love

Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML

by sick and awkward / 05/20/2012 at 2:11am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML

by uni life / 05/15/2012 at 4:08am / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of two years logged into my Facebook account and broke up with himself. He is now receiving loads of sympathy, while I'm being accused of lying about it to save my reputation. FML

by soso / 05/13/2012 at 5:26pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love