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FMLMaximus

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FMLMaximus

41Fucked!

FMLMaximusFMLMaximus
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 September 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4589
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About FMLMaximus : Mother, gamer, reader, love being outside with the earth. Only here to read FMLs but I enjoy meeting new people as well. I have been an avid reader of FMLs since I was in high school. I have yet to get one posted but I'm optimistic about it. :P

FMLMaximus's page activity

Visits<b>jill97</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 11:26am<b>wafflelover</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 11:53am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 3:19pm<b>lungjiao</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 1:17am<b>Malteser95</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 3:00pm<b>laurellkawes</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 10:03pm<b>hullarms</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 9:16am<b>jessejaymz08</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 3:50pm<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 12:35am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 10:19pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 12:54pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 11:16am<b>nfedrichy</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 11:01am<b>TheArrow1</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 11:44am<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 8:16am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 7:04pm<b>ncbb5</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 8:37am<b>BandAid1865</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 11:33pm

Fucked!<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 6:36am<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:54pm<b>dcam13</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 7:53am<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 11:58am<b>pokysmalls</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 5:27am<b>melons</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 4:57pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 8:23am<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 10:33pm<b>kirstyfunnybunny</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 9:14am<b>nfedrichy</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 10:52pm<b>Chinhull</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 6:56am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 3:44am<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:14am<b>fadiuj</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:24am<b>MrThump</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:21am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:19am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 9:55am<b>Charles900</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:05am

FMLMaximus's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of FMLMaximus's badges

FMLMaximus's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

#21523112
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19441) - you deserved it (2416)

On 02/05/2016 at 3:33pm - misc - by UUUGHHH (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I walked around town I noticed some guys and even a couple of girls checked me out. When I got home later I realized they probably weren't checking me out, so much as wondering why the hell I had thick black eyeliner on only one eye. Oops. FML

#21523085
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16352) - you deserved it (4528)

On 02/05/2016 at 2:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while at work at a small Microsoft partner company, I had to write an email explaining why Internet Explorer is superior to Google Chrome. FML

#21523050
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22754) - you deserved it (2232)

On 02/05/2016 at 11:36am - work - by Coccinelle - France

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, which he was happy about, until I told him in the interest of fair play he also had to let me fuck him with a strap on. It didn't take him very long to suddenly decide anal is disgusting, with all kinds of health risks. And he thinks he's the smart one. FML

#21522856
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20339) - you deserved it (3081)

On 02/04/2016 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by sandra (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parent's bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

#21497961
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20111) - you deserved it (26736)

On 11/28/2015 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by aj513 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend told me he took pictures of me while I was sleeping. Instead of it being all cute like you see on social media, there's me sleeping with his dirty-ass sock on my face and him smiling in the background. FML

#21494299
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21561) - you deserved it (2060)

On 11/19/2015 at 3:15am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

#21493785
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27745) - you deserved it (8729)

On 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his penis and shocked him. FML

#21493038
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25880) - you deserved it (4813)

On 11/15/2015 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by nnniii - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my immediate supervisor had modified my phone in the priority order at our call center. As a result, any calls that came in during the night shift would be routed to my phone first, so that he can play games on his phone uninterrupted. It's been a whole year. FML

#21490774
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22603) - you deserved it (1669)

On 11/10/2015 at 10:17am - work - by YouBossturd (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML

#21489374
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24300) - you deserved it (1999)

On 11/06/2015 at 9:03pm - health - by Anonymouse -

Today, I dropped my phone between my legs and tried to catch it with my thighs. Instead, the phone fell through just as I crushed my own balls with my legs. FML

#21486155
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19536) - you deserved it (4714)

On 10/30/2015 at 1:01pm - health - by MedChew - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML

#21483245
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25545) - you deserved it (3565)

On 10/23/2015 at 12:05am - work - by Embarrassed ass. (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend found out that male goats will stick their tongues out, snort, and garble at female goats in heat. Now he's doing it to me at all manner of times, sound effects and all. I now know why goats ram their heads into things repeatedly. FML

#21479981
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23641) - you deserved it (2179)

On 10/14/2015 at 12:22pm - love - by StillnothowIimaginedmydaygoing (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while on a haunted trail, I accidentally punched a high-schooler in the throat. FML

#21478538
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20322) - you deserved it (4338)

On 10/11/2015 at 8:31am - misc - by MeaganElizabethM (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML

#21475588
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23793) - you deserved it (4212)

On 10/03/2015 at 3:42am - love - by JJ (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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