Eyeslick

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Offline (the 06/24/2016 at 6:10am)

Eyeslick

84Fucked!

Eyeslick
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 January 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8508
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Eyeslick : Hello! Welcome to my boring life! I'm not too special, I love listening to peoples problems and hopefully help find a solution to said problem. I am also very interested in psychology and the human body so because of these things I hope to be a psychiatrist some day to help people who have struggled like me! I am also very religious but please don't try to argue....You believe what you want and I'll believe what I want:)

If you already can't tell by my picture; I'm very serious about everything....(sarcasm)

There's not much more interesting about me other then being an avid gamer, Lifeguard, Fighter (Jiu-jitsu),soccer (Futbol) player (High School and Competitive) and an average swimmer...That's about it :D

Eyeslick's page activity

Visits<b>uhhitsmegan</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 5:11pm<b>v4valour</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 3:46pm<b>alixlauren</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 3:17pm<b>shyy_girl</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 12:33pm<b>SadieDex</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 1:56pm<b>Crazynocatlady</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 5:56pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 3:57pm<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 8:39pm<b>Lorrali</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 10:40pm<b>shanewh40</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 6:41am<b>teenagedropout</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 8:14pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 3:53am<b>firemuncher</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 10:11pm<b>AnnaDelRey</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 4:21am<b>connorthomas</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 10:36am<b>max367</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 12:28pm<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 7:29pm<b>bigirlsrockoxox</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 1:10am

Fucked!<b>uhhitsmegan</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 8:16pm<b>shanewh40</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 2:28pm<b>Neverlandsqueen</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 3:45pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 10:27pm<b>Marelena20</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 7:56pm<b>davie94</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 4:16am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 2:56am<b>alixlauren</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 11:07pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 8:49pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 7:44am<b>tellyc</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 1:38am<b>ardenxo</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 12:22am<b>GreekGleek6</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 8:43pm<b>hellnosucka</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 7:51pm<b>lexiieeex3</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 7:11pm<b>ZoeeeGuyss</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 5:40pm<b>smallandroid</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 3:59pm<b>coyotefox</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 3:43pm

Eyeslick's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

See all of Eyeslick's badges

Eyeslick's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML

by Chelsea / 02/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

by stillfuckingcrying / 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm / Sweden (Kalmar Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2013 at 6:47am / United Kingdom (North Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2013 at 12:07am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2013 at 12:07am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

by Target / 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

by excusemeprincess / 02/11/2013 at 12:08pm / United States (New York) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2013 at 6:12am / United States / Kids

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

by Experience / 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML

by facepalm / 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

by Fireguy92 / 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm / United States (Michigan) / Work