Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EllaJSwiftie

Offline (the 07/16/2014 at 9:34pm) | Search for a member

EllaJSwiftie

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 21369
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About EllaJSwiftie : Hi! I'm Ella and i'm from the Netherlands.. That's all I got to say :P
Oh, and I love Taylor Swift. :D

And... please stop using FML as a dating site, I'm single and I love it

EllaJSwiftie's page activity

Visits<b>Caro97songs</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 4:40am<b>bps315</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 12:25pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 1:36pm<b>boultzboi</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 11:58pm<b>imkool136</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 6:36am<b>drunk_crow</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 5:00pm<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 12:32pm<b>ben_hzo</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:29pm<b>rapsac200</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 10:50am<b>countrygirl2272</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:22am<b>aardvarkish</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 2:08am<b>poemqueen</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 7:11pm<b>cadyshaw17</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 11:18am<b>iMark</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:06pm<b>marcthegreatest</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 10:45pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 6:38pm<b>saraveeyuh</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 11:06pm<b>fml85483</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:39pm

Fucked!<b>imkool136</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 12:36pm<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:32pm

EllaJSwiftie's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of EllaJSwiftie's badges

EllaJSwiftie's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that my dog has more work experience than I do. He's a retired military working dog, and I have a Master's degree. FML

#21042693
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41222) - you deserved it (5273)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:22am - animals - by Pooper scooper - Guam

Today, I got my wedding photos back. The only decent picture of my husband and me together also featured a fat guy in a crop top behind us. FML

#21041939
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42879) - you deserved it (4711)

On 01/27/2014 at 3:55pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my mom walked into my room to talk to me. I was surprised because we don't talk much. I was left with a smile on my face after she left, until I realized she'd stolen all the candy on my desk while I wasn't looking. FML

#21041865
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44014) - you deserved it (5034)

On 01/27/2014 at 2:26pm - love - by love you too mommy - United States (New York)

Today, my roommate showed me a video of a cockroach crawling all over my face while I was asleep in the lounge. FML

#21041659
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49973) - you deserved it (4203)

On 01/27/2014 at 9:40am - animals - by mac - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was helping my elderly neighbor carry her groceries into her kitchen. When I finished, she sighed and said, "You're such a sweet girl. It's just a shame about your face." FML

#21040445
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47141) - you deserved it (3636)

On 01/26/2014 at 8:08am - misc - by neighbor - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

#21040159
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47343) - you deserved it (9685)

On 01/25/2014 at 11:29pm - kids - by mom - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML

#21039900
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25589) - you deserved it (50167)

On 01/25/2014 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband decided to put different condiments on my body to make our sex better. I was thinking whipped cream; he was feeling ketchup. FML

#21039277
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51831) - you deserved it (5868)

On 01/25/2014 at 7:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

#21038727
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49783) - you deserved it (5477)

On 01/24/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my mom took a picture of me. All she could say about the picture was, "At least your sister is pretty." 5ML

#21038006
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41471) - you deserved it (3766)

On 01/24/2014 at 7:36am - love - by MH - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my husband and I are sick. He keeps whining about how bad he feels. I'm just as sick, as well as 7 months pregnant. I've not only been taking care of his whiny ass: I've cooked, cleaned, and gone to the store several times because the tissues we had were too rough on his nose. FML

#21035436
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61466) - you deserved it (8716)

On 01/21/2014 at 8:16pm - health - by AnonWife - United Kingdom (North Lincolnshire)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend can sleepwalk. She got up, came into the living room where I was laying back against the sofa playing video games. I wasn't really paying much attention, until she stepped on my crotch, after which she left. She doesn't remember a thing. FML

#21035414
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44920) - you deserved it (5968)

On 01/21/2014 at 7:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my brother asked me if I wanted to see a magic trick. I stupidly said yes and now have a black eye from where he punched me. My dad thinks it's hilarious and my mum says he didn't know any better. He's 13. FML

#21035253
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45662) - you deserved it (5792)

On 01/21/2014 at 5:27pm - health - by cuntocracy (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

#21034785
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48008) - you deserved it (5197)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:07am - kids - by sickmom (woman) - United States (Louisiana)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: