Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EllaJSwiftie

Offline (the 07/16/2014 at 9:34pm) | Search for a member

EllaJSwiftie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 16328
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About EllaJSwiftie : Hi! I'm Ella and i'm from the Netherlands.. That's all I got to say :P
Oh, and I love Taylor Swift. :D

And... please stop using FML as a dating site, I'm single and I love it

EllaJSwiftie's page activity

Visits<b>ben_hzo</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:29pm<b>rapsac200</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 10:50am<b>hkorbcf</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 4:26pm<b>countrygirl2272</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:22am<b>aardvarkish</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 2:08am<b>poemqueen</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 7:11pm<b>cadyshaw17</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 11:18am<b>iMark</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:06pm<b>marcthegreatest</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 10:45pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 6:38pm<b>saraveeyuh</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 11:06pm<b>fml85483</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:39pm<b>Helen_1988</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:13pm<b>Snowble11</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:03pm<b>Kereko</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 2:27am<b>bethabear12</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 4:43pm<b>kktik</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 8:06pm<b>bossness061</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 9:48am

EllaJSwiftie's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of EllaJSwiftie's badges

EllaJSwiftie's favorite FMLs

Today upon being askd to name all the planets I had to sing along to a Lady Gaga song in mah head to remember them. FML

#21085874
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29021) - you deserved it (11224)

On 03/13/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Venus - United States (California)

Today, we finally moved into our new home, which mah husband and I got mostly so our kids could have fun in the spacious backyard. The moment they stepped into the backyard, they were terrorized by the nieghbor's dogs, and now refuse to go outside. FML

TODAY MY MOTHER TOOK ME TO GO AND SEE MY GRANDFATHER,HO I HADN'T SEEN SINCE I WAS 4. THE FIRST THING HE SAID TO ME WAS, "PFWOARR, LOOK AT THOSE TITS." BIG FAT FML

#21085518
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54669) - you deserved it (5752)

On 03/13/2014 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I met my mom's new busines partner for te frst time. I sook is and, and introduced myself as "Lisa's daugter". I'm a guy. mega FML

#21085066
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34550) - you deserved it (11782)

On 03/12/2014 at 6:23pm - work - by CurtisWogan (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML

#21084790
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43660) - you deserved it (5004)

On 03/12/2014 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend askedhy I never let him go down on me. I told him that it doesn't do much fir me, even though it really does. I didn't have the courage to tell him that it's because he acts lyk a rabid doghen he does. FML

Taday my neighbor came over and yelld at me 4 traumatizing her kids. What did I do? Nothing. Her kids enterd my back yard dug up my 1-month-dead hamster and freakd out. FML

#21084613
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45215) - you deserved it (3116)

On 03/12/2014 at 2:39am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, on Facabook, somaona wrota a status implying that sha was going to kill harsalf . I callad a mutual friand, asking to chack up on har . Tha naxt status tha girl puts up said, "Somaona thought I was going to commit suicida! Haha what a losar!" FML

#21071970
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50170) - you deserved it (4622)

On 02/26/2014 at 4:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I wanted to pretend to have a seizure so mah baby sister could know when to call 911. When I fell down an started to pretend, she decided to drink mah soda instead of helping me. FML

#21071750
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38203) - you deserved it (14963)

On 02/25/2014 at 10:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

today I was talking to boyfriend about some recent looool family drama sister has been causing. He quickly lost interest and startd jacking off right next to me. FML

#21071183
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41920) - you deserved it (7464)

On 02/25/2014 at 11:59am - love - by jill (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today Mah Mum Asked Me How The Guinea Pig Was Doing. We Don't Have A Guinea Pig. Turns Out She Had Volunteered Me To Look After The Next Door Neighbor's Guinea Pighen They Were Away And 'forgot' To Tell Me. They Have Been Gone Two Weeks. FML

#21071021
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49882) - you deserved it (3565)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:59am - animals - by HelpMe (man) - United Kingdom (Scottish Borders, The)

Today, I Trew An Eraser At Ma Broter To Get Is Attention Cuz E Couldn't Ear Me Over Is Music. Bieng In A Bad Mood, E Tougt I Was Trying To Aggravate Is Bad Mood And Responded By Trowing A Small Desk Cactus Back. FML

#21071018
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37889) - you deserved it (13419)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:31am - misc - by ThatGuyWithFMLs (man) - Japan (Osaka)

Today, I laarnad that I'm tha only parson in mah family that our naw cat likas. Sha slaaps on mah bad and always sits in mah lap and daspisas avaryona alsa. I'm allargic to cats. FML

#21070365
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44062) - you deserved it (4216)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:05pm - animals - by Good choice cat (woman) - United States (California)

Today , I was walking a dog at the animal hospitalhere I workhen it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor,ho told me to clean it off to seehat it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the ownerhen they pick their dog up. real FML

#21069925
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36780) - you deserved it (2914)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:01pm - animals - by crap - United States (Nevada)

Today , I was trying to study fir a test when my brother an his friends decided to play the chant game , meaning one person yells something werd an everyone else has to say it back without laughing . All I heard fir about two hours was them yelling things like , "DICK NIPPLES." fat FML

#21069920
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35113) - you deserved it (3294)

On 02/23/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by DIY560 - United States (Pennsylvania)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: