Elfses

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/13/2016 at 10:10am)

Elfses

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 4 May 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 566
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Elfses's page activity

Visits<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 3:11pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 11:17pm<b>FuckFace10</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 12:34am<b>Xenoron</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:36pm<b>Headcrab</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:58pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:50pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 2:27pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 9:05am<b>_briianna</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 10:17pm<b>sammypernice</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 5:09pm<b>FallenShadows</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 11:41pm<b>eveoftherivers</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 11:55am<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 12:55am<b>nicehuh</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 8:19am<b>shorty6823</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 7:13am<b>lukeyhoward79236</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 4:26am<b>raphanne</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 3:31pm<b>arsenicalhumor</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 4:05am

Elfses's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of Elfses's badges

Elfses's favorite FMLs

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML

by iwassoclose / 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML

by dancekat / 04/08/2013 at 5:17am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after about fifteen minutes of my cat bullying me into letting him get onto my lap, I finally caved. He clambered on, turned around, farted in my direction and got off as fast as he got on. FML

by orely44 / 03/08/2013 at 9:13am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Animals

Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML

by dormeur / 01/18/2013 at 6:39am / Animals

Today, I had three things converge that should never be together: my period, hot doctor, and a colonoscopy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2012 at 3:42am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

by piece of shed / 08/31/2011 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, while on my honeymoon with my new wife, I tried to be romantic by installing a clapper to the lights in our room. As things progressed, the noise of our love making triggered the lights on and off repeatedly. She began to laugh and we ended up just calling it an early night. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 12:08pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I spent a long time steam-cleaning a mystery stain on my living room carpet. I turned the light on to get a better look at it, and realized that it was a shadow. FML

by kebaby / 06/19/2010 at 7:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were exchanging some naughty pictures. I accidentally sent one to everybody on my contacts, including my ex, my boss, and even Pizza Hut. FML

by Anonymous / 06/20/2009 at 3:08pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML

by Anonymous / 04/20/2009 at 1:55pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my cat didn't quite manage to eat the whole turkey because it was frozen. He just licked it all over. FML

by bundie / 12/28/2008 at 2:02am / Animals