Elementsk8r7280

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Elementsk8r7280

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3736
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Elementsk8r7280 : I'd type something clever or witty here, but I honestly can't think of anything at this moment. Oh well.

Elementsk8r7280's page activity

Visits<b>redwrath</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 5:27pm<b>asnakelovinbabe</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 1:19am<b>KarmaIsBeautiful</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 5:08pm<b>whatismyusername</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 6:35pm<b>ThisIsHard</b> - the 04/20/2013 at 7:52pm<b>FIFAxLegacy</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 2:49pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 10:46pm<b>doctorhook86</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 1:55am<b>dpr130498</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 12:10pm<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 9:24pm<b>swagisforchumps</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 4:08pm<b>oj101</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 3:55pm<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 5:22pm<b>mjhakes</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 6:46pm<b>EsOSiQueEs</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 6:11pm<b>gneask</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 11:56pm<b>sktlzz14</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 3:38pm

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Elementsk8r7280's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

by ladylol / 11/24/2012 at 8:54am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Intimacy

Today, after I gave birth to our first child, my husband looked at the doctor and seriously asked, "When do you circumcise the baby?" We had a baby girl. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2012 at 6:32am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

by Holy Testacles / 10/17/2012 at 12:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I had to call AAA for the fifth time in two months. When the driver got out, I instantly recognized him. It was the same guy who helped me out all the previous occasions. When he saw me, he snorted and doubled over laughing. FML

by big steve / 02/11/2012 at 1:35pm / United States (Arizona) / Transportation

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

by great / 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm / United States / Work

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

by BoringFucker / 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Animals

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2012 at 11:33am / United Kingdom (Armagh) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm / United Arab Emirates / Kids

Today, I had to cancel my wedding. On top of being upset about the break up, I was informed I owed a $900 cancellation fee for not using the venue. Single and broke. FML

by metalflower01 / 01/11/2012 at 11:31am / United States / Money

Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML

by RatFailure / 01/11/2012 at 12:23am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher; I've already given students detention for falling asleep in class this year. FML

by nevasurprised / 01/10/2012 at 9:50am / Germany / Work

Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML

by fuckparents / 01/09/2012 at 6:01pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2012 at 2:34am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML