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EdoItachi

Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 5:17am) | Search for a member

EdoItachi

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 319
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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EdoItachi's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

#21288518
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (25101)

On 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to an auction for the first time. When the run-down house I wanted to bid for came up, I opened bidding at £12,000 and surprisingly won. Feeling pleased, I turned to the person next to me and said, "Lucky me!" She replied, "Yes, lucky you!" and then under her breath said, "Cockhead". FML

#21080041
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36764) - you deserved it (8720)

On 03/06/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was shopping for dresses when my fiancé turned into what I can only call a groomzilla. He told me and my maid of honor that we need to lose weight because he's not "paying all this money for a pair of fatties to not look good." FML

#21075933
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43838) - you deserved it (6767)

On 03/02/2014 at 2:09pm - money - by Ms. Piggy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to a family reunion. I laughed at my uncle's Sylvester Stallone impression. Turns out he had a stroke a while back. FML

#21066428
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35463) - you deserved it (15024)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:06am - misc - by heyadrian - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend "got even" with me after an argument by telling people that I've been beating her. Three guys later came over to my place and beat the crap out of me. Her reaction: "I didn't think they'd take it so serious!" FML

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML

#20502433
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42924) - you deserved it (3520)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

#20435818
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42809) - you deserved it (14269)

On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML

#20428520
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27803) - you deserved it (3556)

On 12/28/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by say dump him and i'll kill you (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, while my girlfriend was playing a game on my phone, an unknown number sent me a nude picture and the words "Miss you, baby." This person's mistake just cost me a black eye, and probably my relationship too. FML

#20427797
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41487) - you deserved it (3995)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

#20418714
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46050) - you deserved it (25275)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, it was my 2 year anniversary with my boyfriend. As we were about to exchange gifts, he got a call and said he had to go home immediately. What was the emergency? His guild leader couldn't find another healer to finish a raid and promised my boyfriend gear if he would step up. FML

#20120587
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21044) - you deserved it (4092)

On 10/17/2012 at 1:16am - love - by Marie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML

#19979145
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26139) - you deserved it (17941)

On 07/23/2012 at 3:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, my cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, and making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML

#19941503
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23156) - you deserved it (3154)

On 07/15/2012 at 3:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22897) - you deserved it (6224)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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