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Ebola's favorite FMLs
by sakurabloom / 05/04/2016 at 4:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by blondessdoll / 05/04/2016 at 1:30pm / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 05/04/2016 at 10:15am / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Kids
by unmarried / 05/03/2016 at 8:39pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/03/2016 at 5:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I went to visit his grandparents. Everything went well, until his grandmother approached me and asked me if I wanted to try some of her old bras. I didn't want to be rude, so I went with her. Most awkward moment of my life. FML
by Sara / 05/03/2016 at 12:52pm / Netherlands / Miscellaneous
Today, my overweight colleague twisted his ankle. He's pretty self-conscious about his weight, but I had a brain-fart and told him he shouldn't try to put too much weight on it. His feelings are more hurt than his ankle now. FML
by WeighYourWords / 05/03/2016 at 7:12am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Work
by insurgent / 05/03/2016 at 4:31am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/02/2016 at 5:42pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
Today, I want on a date with a man I met on the internet. While talking over drinks, I asked him what he did for a living. He said he was a salesman, and that he's really good at it. Interested, I asked him what it was he sold. "Cannabis." FML
by socksxox / 05/02/2016 at 5:19pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love
Today, we were doing research on contraceptives in class. Afterwards, the girl next to me starts explaining how "cringey" and "grossed out" she gets when she sees/hears "the words for the private parts." She then tells me all about her getting her period that morning in explicit detail. FML
by howdoesthatmakesense / 05/02/2016 at 4:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, since I always fall asleep in class, I decided not to go to the bathroom beforehand, hoping the sensation to pee would keep me awake. I ended up falling asleep and wetting myself in the middle of the lecture. FML
by Pee.H.D / 05/02/2016 at 1:24pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Alex White / 05/02/2016 at 12:50pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend keeps requesting that I make eye contact when I give him blowjobs. He won't let up about it. I don't know how to break it to him that his penis is too small for me to suck and look upward at the same time. FML
by oh gee / 05/02/2016 at 1:01am / Intimacy