About Ebola : you don't want to know
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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Ebola's favorite FMLs
Today, I spoke to a highly recommended therapist for my special-needs child. After 45 minutes of describing our challenges, heartbreaks and other very personal information, she told me that her schedule was permanently full. But she invited me to go through the phone book to find someone else. FML
by Hi_Five / 12/03/2015 at 3:48pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
Today, I was walking on my crutches towards the bus through the rain. The bus driver looked into my eyes, punching the button to close the doors while I was still a few meters away. As he drove off, he kept his eyes on me, while I had to wait for another 15 minutes for the next bus in the rain. FML
by shaft2112 / 12/03/2015 at 3:19pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Transportation
Today, I was getting my picture taken with my mom and grandma for a portrait. I said it was going to be beautiful when it was done, with three generations of our family in it. My grandma said that would be true, if I weren't adopted. FML
by GraceWaldorf93 / 12/03/2015 at 11:45am / Belize (Belize) / Miscellaneous
Today, I grazed my hand over the bottom of my desk's keyboard tray, and found something sticky. I gagged when I realized it was jizz, and I immediately washed my hands and wiped everything. I then checked my browser history, which was full of porn. Thanks, roomie. FML
by katluvnc / 12/03/2015 at 9:02am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/03/2015 at 4:47am / United States (Oregon) / Work
Today, after being sick all day with the flu, I asked my husband to wash the dishes after I went to bed. He said he couldn't because he had a large, important project for work that needed to get done. I woke up a couple of hours later to find him smoking weed on the couch and watching cartoons. FML
by shotdown / 12/02/2015 at 3:45pm / United States (California) / Love
by ujellybro234 / 12/01/2015 at 11:52am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, HR sent a review email to me asking me to anonymously tell them about my boss. I decided to use this opportunity to tell them what a dick he was. I printed off the review, filled it out, then scanned and emailed it to myself. Or so I thought. Turns out I'd sent the review to my boss. FML
by jobless / 11/30/2015 at 11:01pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Work
Today, my school's theater production was canceled. Not because of budget, but because my co-star fell in love with me and asked me out. When I pointedly declined, he refused to act alongside me since it was "awkward." Everyone's blaming me for it. FML
by Anonymous / 11/30/2015 at 11:34am / United States (New York) / Love
by cole66 / 11/29/2015 at 1:43pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/29/2015 at 1:04am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML
by Anonymous / 11/28/2015 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Work
by AlwaysTired / 11/27/2015 at 10:21pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spent half an hour trying to convince my husband not to re-enact a video he saw online of a guy tying some rope to a running chainsaw, then swinging it around his head. He finally agreed not to do something so stupid. A few hours later, he did it anyway. FML
by Anonymous / 11/27/2015 at 7:50am / United States (California) / Love
Today, my boss confirmed he is a micro-managing asshole. We walked into the office together and I turned on the lights. He switched them off and switched them on again, just to make sure that I did it right. FML
by fabz / 11/27/2015 at 7:39am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Work