Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ebola

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

Ebola

10Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 43451
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Ebola : I never know what to write.

26 years old

Undergrad in biochem
Masters in biotechnology

I'm a research scientist

Ebola's page activity

Visits<b>YBae</b> - 22 hours ago<b>I_Like_Dogs</b> - yesterday at 7:06pm<b>Caro97songs</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 12:16pm<b>lucythomson</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 6:08am<b>a_cool_guy</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 4:16pm<b>funneh1</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:50pm<b>LibertyLife20</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:14pm<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:46am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:27am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 8:46pm<b>NateshN</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 7:30pm<b>CommentKing207</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 10:38am<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 10:51pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:24pm<b>Cody4827</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 10:43pm<b>Bree06</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 7:44am<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:40am<b>runninggirl8</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:55pm

Fucked!<b>YBae</b> - 21 hours ago<b>I_Like_Dogs</b> - yesterday at 1:06am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 10:46am<b>CommentKing207</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 4:38pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:33pm<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 6:32am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:05am<b>Purplesinger</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:36am<b>TiggyBonkers</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 11:23pm

Ebola's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Ebola's badges

Ebola's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

#21460430
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17964) - you deserved it (7681)

On 08/25/2015 at 6:10am - misc - by Anon - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while in line at the supermarket, I told the lady behind me that she had a cute baby. She shot me a disgusted look and straight up accused me of being a pedophile. FML

#21460397
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22002) - you deserved it (1460)

On 08/25/2015 at 2:49am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after putting in 110% at my shitty job for two years straight, my boss told me point-blank I'm too good in my current position for him to ever be able to justify promoting me. FML

#21460378
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20895) - you deserved it (1350)

On 08/25/2015 at 1:51am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, I got stuck in the elevator at work. When I was finally let out, my boss decided I shouldn't get a lunch break, because I'd already had over an hour off work while in the elevator. I had to starve through 5 more hours of work. FML

#21460168
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22544) - you deserved it (1442)

On 08/24/2015 at 5:28pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Liguria)

Today, I was unaware that me losing my virginity was also breakup sex. FML

#21460101
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24942) - you deserved it (2297)

On 08/24/2015 at 2:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my summer babysitting job. The family's dog puked on the carpet and I proceeded to clean it up with baking soda and a mix of water/vinegar. Instead of blending in with the other areas of the carpet, the one spot I cleaned is white while the other areas are still darkened by filth. FML

#21460085
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20147) - you deserved it (1992)

On 08/24/2015 at 1:32pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after nearly 2 years, my now ex-girlfriend decided she was ready to have sex. Specifically, sex with my dad. FML

#21459616
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25512) - you deserved it (1566)

On 08/23/2015 at 9:45am - love - by pontwa (man) - Australia

Today, I told my friend about a fight I had earlier with my girlfriend. He thought it'd be funny to use my phone while I was in the bathroom and text her "ure such a cunt". She wouldn't believe the truth, even when my friend confessed to her. She thought I paid him to take the fall. FML

#21459591
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20687) - you deserved it (2038)

On 08/23/2015 at 6:22am - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I came home from a stay at my girlfriend's place. My little brother stepped on my bag and accidentally switched my vibrator on. I told him the buzzing sound was my electric toothbrush. He went to the bathroom and came back with the toothbrush. He won't stop asking what's in my bag. FML

Today, I woke up early for work. Had my coffee, finished up a report and headed out of my house. Not only was the office closed today, but the silent alarm was on, which is triggered by a door opening even if you use a key. I was startled by the cops searching the building, ran, and got tazed. FML

#21459236
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19571) - you deserved it (5708)

On 08/22/2015 at 8:21am - work - by BryanTazed - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband wanted to use bacon grease as lube. FML

#21459209
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19597) - you deserved it (6947)

On 08/22/2015 at 6:18am - intimacy - by fuck no (woman) - India (Kerala)

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

#21458908
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9809) - you deserved it (29229)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML

#21458894
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26905) - you deserved it (2196)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML

#21458879
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20874) - you deserved it (5594)

On 08/21/2015 at 2:22pm - health - by fuck (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: