DustySecrets

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Offline (the 04/23/2016 at 2:16pm)

DustySecrets

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2032
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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DustySecrets's page activity

Visits<b>ksoul1995</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 10:42pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 9:44pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 3:50am<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 9:01pm<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 4:46pm<b>ColorOfSoul</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 5:39am<b>colton_colton</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 12:52am<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 6:04pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 11:35pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 9:45pm<b>thatguy240</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:22pm<b>cookiecat19</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 12:32am<b>briang959</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 8:58am<b>kirstenmartin</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 2:49pm

Fucked!<b>ksoul1995</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 4:42am<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 10:46pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 12:04am<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:34pm

DustySecrets's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of DustySecrets's badges

DustySecrets's favorite FMLs

Today, the priest at my wedding farted. Everyone thought it was me. The guests, my bride, even the priest himself looked at me in disgust before continuing. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 9:33pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 11:26am / Canada (Manitoba) / Kids

Today, I walked in on my dad completely naked. When I expressed my displeasure, he told me to knock next time. I'd agree with him, if he hadn't been standing in the middle of the hallway in our very open living room. FML

by Eminnis / 08/30/2015 at 11:27pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2015 at 11:44am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was lying on a couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

by Annie / 08/24/2015 at 4:46am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML

by fuck / 08/21/2015 at 2:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

by makeyourselfathome / 09/17/2014 at 8:18am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2014 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (Liverpool) / Love

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2014 at 10:39am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend got her period. It seemed more painful for her than usual, so I offered to go out and buy some painkillers and maybe some chocolate for her. She thought I was being sarcastic and slapped me so hard I saw stars. FML

by nhyari / 08/25/2014 at 2:58pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

by JackieD / 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Washington) / Money