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DustySecrets

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DustySecrets

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 January 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1640
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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DustySecrets's page activity

Visits<b>thatguy240</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:22pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 9:34am<b>cookiecat19</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 12:32am<b>briang959</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 8:58am<b>kirstenmartin</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 2:49pm

Fucked!<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:34pm

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DustySecrets's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

#21462545
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16923) - you deserved it (1223)

On 08/30/2015 at 11:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was lying on a couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

#21459977
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18719) - you deserved it (8098)

On 08/24/2015 at 4:46am - misc - by Annie (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML

#21458879
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20896) - you deserved it (5605)

On 08/21/2015 at 2:22pm - health - by fuck (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42079) - you deserved it (2881)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML

#21259479
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39664) - you deserved it (8896)

On 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

#21259401
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38467) - you deserved it (3353)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

#21258820
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35890) - you deserved it (4061)

On 09/15/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

#21257417
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40557) - you deserved it (4435)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend got her period. It seemed more painful for her than usual, so I offered to go out and buy some painkillers and maybe some chocolate for her. She thought I was being sarcastic and slapped me so hard I saw stars. FML

#21245120
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43278) - you deserved it (3965)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:58pm - misc - by nhyari (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39636) - you deserved it (15268)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

#21244527
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36333) - you deserved it (4248)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML

#21244424
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38989) - you deserved it (13670)

On 08/24/2014 at 1:31pm - work - by Alisterine - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a TV show about wildlife. The moment the narrator said the word "peacock", my boyfriend broke down into hysterical laughter. He laughed to the point of tears, and had to excuse himself. I'm dating a man-child. FML

#21243818
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38651) - you deserved it (8063)

On 08/23/2014 at 1:51pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the living room. I jumped up and went running, only to find out it was my mother, who'd screamed at some dramatic plot twist in a Sex and the City episode. FML

#21243243
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38044) - you deserved it (3324)

On 08/22/2014 at 4:26pm - misc - by leastitwasntsurpriseanal (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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